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What do you think,,,,

My son sounded out and wrote a short story about spiderman tonight ( he's 5-1/2 and will start kindergarten in sept) you could tell what the words were even though ALL weren't spelled right, my husband tried to teach him about spacing words apart, Max wasn't getting it, I got home and taught him "finger width apart" he got it sometimes, not others so I just reminded him often.. as I put him to bed tonight my son says " Dad told me that if my teacher saw my writing with no spaces she'd crumble it up and throw it in the garbage " OMG I"m soo upset, he says I baby my son but isn't the point at this age to encourage jus trying and the fact he knows ALL His letters, sounding them all out and writing them himself??

 
maxsmom11807

Asked by maxsmom11807 at 9:57 PM on May. 13, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 29 (40,703 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • What a absolutely amazing thing your son did! I would tell your son "you want to know something sweetheart? When your daddy was young like you believe it or not that is how teachers were" "and your daddy had that happen to one of his papers, but teachers dont act like that anymore. Teachers years ago use to be very strict, but I know that your teacher will be absolutely amazed at how wonderful you did." That way your son wont feel hurt by his father. BUT, I would definately talk to dad in private. Men get so hung up on black and white boxes they forget about all the strokes of color needed to fill those boxes! I'm sure he thought he was doing what was right, but even though he is a boy, he is a child and requires encouragement and nurturing to grow into a wonderful young man! Mom, with you I'm sure that is exactly what he will do!
    forevermaw

    Answer by forevermaw at 10:40 AM on May. 14, 2013

  • Did you ask your SO what he said, exactly? Or did you just take your son's interpretation as the gospel truth?
    Mrs_Prissy

    Answer by Mrs_Prissy at 10:12 PM on May. 13, 2013

  • I don't think it is the worst thing in the world. Perhaps it was a little harsh but it isn't anything that is going to scar the child for life.

    Sounds like your husband just wants him to push for excellence and doesn't want to reward him/Praise him for every "little accomplishment".

    I think in general men have less patience then us...which is probably just in our hard wiring biologically or else we would eat our young lol
    tntmom1027

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 10:42 PM on May. 13, 2013

  • sorry I didn't finish, isnt the fact he knows those things at this point, he's doing amazing and just fine?
    maxsmom11807

    Comment by maxsmom11807 (original poster) at 9:58 PM on May. 13, 2013

  • I take my son's word as truth at this point.. He's yet to steer us differently already... I will talk to my husband tomorrow but even if this is close to truth, dont you think its wrong?
    maxsmom11807

    Comment by maxsmom11807 (original poster) at 10:14 PM on May. 13, 2013

  • If your DH did in fact say that, then he owes your son an apology. Poor little Max. :(. My son is in 3rd grade & I STILL get on him about spacing!
    ABeaverhausen

    Answer by ABeaverhausen at 10:28 PM on May. 13, 2013

  • Words like this while I'm not there makes me wonder what else he says,.. he seems sooo disappointed all the time in our son.. i've talked to him SO often about this, he says I baby him, that he knows also he needs to lighten up on him, needs to be more patient etc. but then this shit happens again
    maxsmom11807

    Comment by maxsmom11807 (original poster) at 10:31 PM on May. 13, 2013

  • It sounds a little harsh to me, if that's what your husband actually said. I'd be proud of the kid for knowing all of the letters and sounding the words out enough to write a story. The finer points of writing will come later. Like Tntmom said, though, men just aren't as patient with kids, in general. I was talking to my boyfriend just the other night, telling him how much I liked it when he did paint by numbers or made snow cones with our daughter, and he said he really had to work at that stuff because it didn't come naturally for him. I was shocked because for me, it's the most natural thing in the world. You probably do baby your son a bit, and Dad needs to lighten up a bit, but hey--your son is learning how to deal with all kinds of different people, which in itself is a good skill to have.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 10:53 PM on May. 13, 2013

  • Perhaps having hubs read a book about kids cognitive skills and milestones may help
    That the kid knows letters spelling etc puts him ahead of the curve
    And hubs may need to be asked
    If a teacher threw maxs work out because it wasnt "perfect" without even reading it would you want to know whether or not the teacher actually had a degree in teaching? Or would you abandon max to the whims of the teacher

    Because everyones idea of perfect is different...
    feralxat

    Answer by feralxat at 11:06 PM on May. 13, 2013

  • Be very careful not to divide your parenting.
    I would ask my husband and then work from there.
    I can not believe you would simply take the child's word without even talking to the man you are supposed to trust with your whole life.
    I would then discuss what children can and cannot be expected to do. He may have been frustrated over the spacing.
    You might want to slow down on your pushing your child's learning. You do not want him to be bored in school.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 1:01 AM on May. 14, 2013

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