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Is it ok for my ex-husband's mother to go up to my children's school and spank them?

This has happened no more than one occasion. I asked the school and my ex-husband to please refrain from her disciplining, and leave it to myself and my ex. He however thinks its just fine for her to deal with it even without contacting me. What do I do?!?

Answer Question
 
Brittany M.

Asked by Brittany M. at 4:37 PM on May. 14, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • You can remove her from the list of people who is allowed to pick up your children.
    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 4:40 PM on May. 14, 2013

  • So he is ok with it and you are not? Is it that he can alow this because he is the father of the kids?
    If the school will not stop it for you. You probably will have to go to court to get it stoped.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 4:41 PM on May. 14, 2013

  • How is that ANYONE can get into the school without your permission?
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 4:42 PM on May. 14, 2013

  • I have a hard time believing she's spanking them right there at the school. School employees are mandated reporters and have to alert CPS when a child is being hit. Are you not in the US?

    I agree, take her off the list of people being allowed to pick them up.
    Ginger0104

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 4:43 PM on May. 14, 2013

  • Depends on the terms of you custody agreement. Here unless specifically denied by the court, if it is joint custody, either parent can be called. You can specify that both be called but the school is not bound by it unless the court specifically orders them to call all parties. In this arrangement the mother or the father has the right to discipline their child and/or designate a third party.  This has to be designated at the school.  It is generally in the who is allowed to pick up my child papers.


    Since I know nothing about your CS I have no way to give you an opinion.


    If you are asking if I agree with this, the answer is yes I do.

    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 4:45 PM on May. 14, 2013

  • You should have notrouble removing your ex husband's mothe from the list of people who may contact your child at school, but you and your ex will need to agree on a replacement person for the list. Beyond that, I'm not sure what your recourse would be. I agree that discipline should be left between you and the children's dad unless they're living with his mom and she's the primary caregiver.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 4:51 PM on May. 14, 2013

  • This sounds weird to me. Why would anyone go to a school to spank any child? Are the kids so out of control that normal school disciplune (staying in at recess, etc) is not effective? Why would a grandma ever be called if shes not the primary guardian? This makes no sense
    Nimue930

    Answer by Nimue930 at 4:54 PM on May. 14, 2013

  • Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:57 PM on May. 14, 2013

  • tell the school to call the police if she show sup to the school again
    LostSoul88

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 4:59 PM on May. 14, 2013

  • Actually there are still schools that do corporal punishment. I had to sign papers saying my child could -couldn't recieve spankings at school.
    funlovinlady

    Answer by funlovinlady at 5:12 PM on May. 14, 2013

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