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Re-entering the dating scene

I am a 51 year old woman who has been single for a good many years. Lately, I've been thinking a lot about maybe finding a partner who can share some of life's pleasures with me.

This is a scary concept for me and my biggest question is what do men in my age group look for in a woman? I'm educated, have a good job and am self-reliant and self-sufficient. However, everything on my body points south. I have wrinkles, stretch marks and I'm about 12 lbs overweight.

My self esteem isn't great, which is another story in itself, but I want to know how much of a roll my body will play. I'm not ugly, but I'm not gorgeous either. I consider myself very average in that I don't think anyone, male or female, gives me a second glance. This is okay, of course, but I just don't know what to expect.

Any advice would be appreciated


Asked by Anonymous at 11:47 AM on May. 19, 2013 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • CONFIDENCE is sexy.
    No one's looking at the rest when the lights are off, and if they are, that's what lingerie is for.
    Go get 'em cougar!

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 2:15 PM on May. 19, 2013

  • You say you don't have a lot of free time, but you might want to try . It's a great place to get involved with activities that you are interested in....hiking groups, reading groups, baseball groups, stamp collecting........anything that interests you. Then you are meeting people who share commone interests. I know a couple of ladies who met the person they are dating by being involved with groups. GL!!

    Answer by silverthreads at 1:55 PM on May. 19, 2013

  • You should know that for a lot of men in our age group (I'm coming up on 50), everything isn't just POINTING south... it's moved there permanently! The good news is that they've moved well beyond the "sex is everything" mindset.

    Since you like baseball, look for fan-oriented activities. is a great idea for finding activities you're interested in. The idea is to go and enjoy the ACTIVITY. If you meet a man, great. If not, STILL great because you've spent time on something you like.

    Answer by gdiamante at 2:01 PM on May. 19, 2013

  • Well, first of all, stay away from the online dating sites and bars. Instead, try to meet men at local events or through friends.

    If you do those things, I don't think it makes a difference what you look like. You need to do things that are of interest to you, that way you can see men that are doing things that you enjoy....

    Men on dating websites, especially at our age, are looking for unreal expectations, or even young women. Also, there are a lot of game playing on those sites.

    Are you interested in sports? Baseball games are great mingling events. Running events?? Swimming pools?

    Answer by m-avi at 11:53 AM on May. 19, 2013

  • I do enjoy baseball a lot. My work doesn't allow me a lot of free time but there is some. I'm a little relieved at the idea of no dating sites. That was a scary concept to me

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:00 PM on May. 19, 2013

  • Doing new things I believe is the key to meeting new potential mates. Volunteer or take a part time job honestly I think most people meet when they have to work together. I agree with staying away from bars, I've never met a quality person in a bar.

    Answer by SaturnsMom at 2:12 PM on May. 19, 2013

  • i wish i was only 12lbs overweight that would be awesome

    Answer by meliscool72 at 3:17 PM on May. 19, 2013

  • Thank you all for the great comments and tips. I feel better about this now so I will check put the site you've recommended

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:18 PM on May. 19, 2013