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Can i please get some words of wisdom?

Please any suggestions I could give to my 23 yr. o son and his friends regarding trying to move to another state.
They always lived in calif, but want a change. There aren’t too many jobs here and they want a fresh start. They have saved together over $5000.
They are in Washington now, looking around, checking out apt, jobs situation.
My son called and is getting discouraged because they had already checked 15 places with no avail. All I could say was don’t get discouraged be sure to bring home newspapers from different towns, and to enjoy the moment.
My son has little experience in adult life; He is a nonsmoker, occasional drinker and no drugs. He has so much potential. I need some words of wisdom so he can understand that it may take a couple more months and it’s ok if he doesn’t move when he said he would.

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Asked by dmr73059 at 5:24 PM on May. 21, 2013 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 12 (841 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • Having 2 boys that age, I can tell you that you can talk to them til you're blue in the face & offer the greatest pearls of wisdom, & have them ignore it! It's good to know you are there when he needs advice, but don't be surprised if he won't follow it. Here's a little something I just told my 22 y/o who is having issues w/ his car & wondered if life was about working to maintain his car & nothing else. I told him "Life is what you make of it. You have to make the best of it. It's important to have a job you enjoy so it won't feel so much like work & the car like anything else you own, will eventually need repaired or replaced." As to the timetable you son has put on himself, life has its own agenda & things will fall into place when they are meant to happen. Best of luck.

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 5:34 PM on May. 21, 2013

  • There aren't many jobs anywhere right now, and it's really hard for all of us to not become discouraged. I would tell him to pursue something he loves to do and try to make a living doing it. For every job that's available, there's a whole bunch of people looking for it, so tell him it's not him--it's just the times in which we are living.

    Answer by NannyB. at 5:34 PM on May. 21, 2013

  • He'll have to figure it out the hard way, by experience--it's not where he's at that will make a change in his life, it's what he decides to do in whatever state he ends up. Just keep being there for him, even if he does't seem to appreciate it. Young adults want a safe place to land once in a while.

    Answer by Ballad at 5:41 PM on May. 21, 2013

  • Tell him to keep trying and just so they do not go thru the money saved, let them know odd jobs are always available until something steady is found.

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 6:31 PM on May. 21, 2013

  • aThanks to all of of your advice. Not only do i truly appreciate your input, every single answer was great!

    Comment by dmr73059 (original poster) at 7:38 PM on May. 21, 2013

  • Both California and Washington are "expensive" states to live in... He may have more luck moving further eastward. We are in Tennessee and our state (knock on wood) was not hit so hard during the recession. We have 7 acres, a 1800 sq. ft home, a 60 x 40 shop, a barn etc... and paid $ 129, 000... We had to add heat and air and hook up to city water later, but it was such a steal.
    A place like ours in Cali would be near half a million dollars.
    There are many people that have moved this far east for the cheaper land/homes.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:45 PM on May. 21, 2013

  • Not everywhere in Washington is expensive. I live in Eastern WA and rent is fairly cheap and land prices are as well.

    My advice...decide what type of work he wants to do and then look for and apply in positions in other places, keeping in mind to check the rent prices etc.

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 9:52 PM on May. 21, 2013

  • I hope these guys have known each other for a long time and will be honest and loyal. Some members of my family moved out of state with friends and then were scewed for rent when the friend decided he had made a mistake and left. I wish them the best!

    Answer by silverthreads at 8:47 AM on May. 22, 2013

  • I would tell him the importance of an education to make it anywhere in this world...once he has got that, the rest is easy........

    Answer by older at 1:39 PM on May. 26, 2013

  • Has he finished college yet? If not, he should at least get an associates. He'll find jobs easier with more education, especially a bachelor's. The positive part is that he can use school to explain any gaps in employment. Another plus is that he can take advantage of school career centers to help him find jobs. Some companies slot specific jobs to students that you won't find elsewhere. I got several good job offers as a student paying $15-25/hour. He could also do cooperative education that gives him work experience for school credit, which knocks out 2 birds w/1 stone. Always add to your experience, even with non-paid internships or volunteer or short-term temp jobs. If he has basic office skills, he can also contact a temp agency.

    Answer by hellokittykat at 1:45 AM on Jun. 2, 2013

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