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Now I remember why I don't like churches...

ugh. My daughter has been going to AWANA with her best friend every week for the last 6-7 months. I let her go because she wanted to and it meant extra time with her best friend plus as a Christian family, I knew they would also be teaching her more about Christ.

Now before I go further let me clarify, we are a Christian Family but we do not attend any one church and we do not consider ourselves a part of one denomination or another. We attend church community events for the most part and a services here and there.

tonight was the end of year Social for AWANA so as a family we went. We enjoyed the food, other than it was REALLY late being served and we sat down for the awards. The awards turned out to be a church popularity contest. One of the pastors kids was in EVERY group. They gave an award for things like 'friendliest, most compassionate and best sport and then awards for merit and a few other awards like, 'Best Clubber'. By the end my 5 year old was in tears because she got jack squat. She was the ONLY kid in her club group to not get something. Just because we are not church members and not on the 'favorites list'.I learned my lesson. No more church clubs for my baby. She was punished because her parents choose not to attend a church regularly and I was reminded of how shallow churches as a whole can be. I would have hated for them to have acknowledged a child who's parents were not members. It might have made us want to come more often.

Is it like this at all churches or just the ones I ever manage to visit? Seems like every time I try to give a church more than just a visit here and there they remind me why I avoid that. Members always come first... even if you come all the time-if you aren't a member you mean nothing.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:44 PM on May. 22, 2013 in Religion & Beliefs

Answers (17)
  • Basically, yeah, because members pay tidings.

    Answer by 3libras at 9:50 PM on May. 22, 2013

  • If it makes you feel better, keep in mind all the gossiping and back stabbing they're doing towards each other once they leave the room.

    Answer by NotPanicking at 9:53 PM on May. 22, 2013

  • Don't even get me started on Awanas. My son went to a awanas at a former church. An incident happened and I promised I would never set foot into that church again. It's been 5 years and even though my parents have invited us back several times, I refuse to go.


    Answer by JeremysMom at 9:56 PM on May. 22, 2013

  • I have been to many churches and so far that seems to be the case with all of them.

    Answer by AF4life at 10:01 PM on May. 22, 2013

  • Synagogues arent much better

    Answer by feralxat at 10:27 PM on May. 22, 2013

  • I can't answer for anywhere else but anytime DH and I were involved in scouts, ( boy and girl) the awards were for what the children earned. It was not a popularity contest or a religious contest. It was strictly scouts. There were kids who got no awards but if you don't do the projects and earn the badges, we can't give them out. I am sorry your child was treated this way. I am not sure if 4H is in your area but that might be a good choice.

    Answer by Dardenella at 10:42 PM on May. 22, 2013

  • I'm really sorry your child was upset and you had a bad experience with a church. It sucks. All I can say is, churches are made up of human beings with the same failings you se anywhere else. It's hurtful when you end up on the short end of the stick.

    Answer by Ballad at 11:38 PM on May. 22, 2013

  • Will your daughter still be allowed to attend with her friend?

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 12:24 AM on May. 23, 2013

  • I was raised Catholic but I find some non-denominational churches and some Baptist ones more welcoming. It really depends on the individual church. I suggest researching the church as a whole. The ones that have a lot of ministries going on, such as counseling, volunteering, tutoring/mentoring, etc., tend to be more focused on the work they do rather than rules. You can really tell how they are by how friendly they are to you on a first visit. I've gone to some churches where no one talked to me at all and others where they eagerly wanted to get to know me. Maybe community theater or hobby groups for kids is a better place. There are a lot of good events and organizations that aren't church-related. I've been in your shoes before and I hate the hypocrisy of some churches.

    Answer by hellokittykat at 2:07 AM on May. 23, 2013

  • I even had one roommate before that taught at a Christian school, but because she wasn't a member of their church, they were going to fire her. It was never a requirement when she was hired and they knew she wasn't at the time, but I guess they hoped to convert her. Talk about the hypocrisy. What happened to opening arms to everyone and teaching tolerance and unity?

    Answer by hellokittykat at 2:12 AM on May. 23, 2013

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