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why should you?

Why should you be over hating your ex before you date again? i will always hate him. He left me for another woman, after i clearly asked him three times before all this happened for a separation. he said no, we can work it out. What he wanted was to find someone first then dump me. i wanted to do it the right way, and i know, i should have went with it the first time. But i don't think you have to stop hating your ex. To me that seems impossible. He humilated me, hurt me and disresepected me and isn't sorry for it.

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Asked by Anonymous at 6:10 PM on Feb. 17, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • If you want to hate him then hate him I say. But what I would say before you date again you should make sure you're over what he did, because if you're not over what he did to you, you will bring it into any future relationships and it probably won't be a lasting relationship..

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:12 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • I agree with anony my ex who is the father of my first child cheated on me many times before I seen what was going on and still to this day I hate him with every bone in my body, but just like she said you have to make sure that your over what he did. I have had a lot of problems in my current relationship because when I went into it I wasn't over what he did. Its alright to hate him just don't let it get in the way of you being happy

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:17 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • You dont have to stop hating him before you start dating otherwise you might be 80 living with an oxygen tank before you start dating. I was in a similiar situation. My ex cheated and he lied about it when I started suspecting it and finally tossed him to the curb. I hate him. I honestly would cheer for joy if someone called to tell me he dropped dead. BUT you have to be over the hurt he caused you before you can move on. Thats the key. If youre hating him because youre hurt which is where most hate comes from, then you arent ready. If you arent hurt anymore and just cant stand the guy then go for it. Ive been remarried since 2006 and seperated from my ex in 2002. My dh and me are happy and my dh knows I hate my ex and hes cool with it, in fact he hates him too.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:30 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • I didnt know you were supposed to be over hating him before you date again. Never heard that.

    Answer by NorahSethsMommy at 6:53 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • Well you may or may not ever stop hating him. My thoughts are that you need to move on. Otherwise your going to be a bitter person. Are you going to be able to love with your whole heart if part of it is harboring hate for another person who you once felt love towards? Give up on the hate, move on to a more adult place. Keeping the hate is just keeping you in the past. Move on. Let it go.

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 9:10 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

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