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How do you deal with the loss of your mom ?

I just burried my mom on Sunday and myMIL was right,its like the days after the services are harder,its really kicking in that my mom is gone.I was busy the days after she passed with making arrangements things like that,I guess I was too busy for it to sink in.I cried alot the clicking noise from them lowering my mom in the ground is embeded in myhead,but now all I want to do is cry & sleep.Im snapping at my husband and kids over nothing,I dont want anyone touching the things that were hers.When will this end ? Its like Im in my own personal HELL !

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4mom247

Asked by 4mom247 at 6:15 PM on Feb. 17, 2009 in Relationships

Level 3 (17 Credits)
Answers (16)
  • im so sorry for your loss.
    SThompson21

    Answer by SThompson21 at 6:17 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • I am very sorry. I don't have any answers for you as I have not been in that situation, but my heart aches for you. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers!
    hilary1122

    Answer by hilary1122 at 6:18 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • im so sorry :[
    aliciatron

    Answer by aliciatron at 6:21 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • I'm sorry too, although I know that doesn't help one little bit. I dread this day because I know I'll be just like this if not worse. My mom is my best friend. You need to remember the good times. Look at pictures. Talk about her. Remember what she liked to do her hobbies. Pick up some of those hobbies or things that she liked to do. Cook foods she liked. Keep her apart of your life as much as you can. AND REMEMBER TO SMILE even if your crying doing all these things- remember they were things that made your mom happy... and strive to be the best mom you can to your kids (to be like her) ;o) again I'm sorry for your loss.
    krazyash023

    Answer by krazyash023 at 6:21 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • I can relate to losing a mom. I lost my mom to cancer On nov 26, 2007... It was the hardest day of my life... we planned her funeral while she was still alive & watched her die on a hospice bed... it was devastating. All i can tell you is TALK about how your feeling, dont keep it in... CRY when you need to cry & deal with your emotions. Dont hide behind a fake smile.

    Its been over a year and it still feels like yesterday it happened... So i know people say it gets easier, & i guess it does... but in my experience... no matter what anyone says... you will struggle with this.... You will gain acceptance but thats your mom...

    If you EVER need to talk, message me... im 20 years old and have lost BOTH of my parents... Im here for ya.
    kwiseman19

    Answer by kwiseman19 at 6:40 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • oh and by the way...

    I had all of my moms clothing & stuff given to me... I have it here & everyone tells me to get rid of it because i have a small apartment and its taking up space and i STILL cant get rid of it... its like the last thing i have of my mom...

    It will get better... TALK ABOUT IT SWEETIE... dont keep it in...
    kwiseman19

    Answer by kwiseman19 at 6:46 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • oh honey! I am so sorry for your loss! I have no advice for you but to be a strong mommy and wife and always remember the good things! I really hope that God brings you the strength for this process!
    Jalisasmommy

    Answer by Jalisasmommy at 6:49 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • I didn't wait and read what anybody else wrote. I am 50 and my mom died 9 years ago. does it get easier ?? no it doesn't. I still miss her terribly. I did not know at the time but I found out that post traumatic stress is treatable. I think anybody that would post this about the sadness of you Mom's passing would be in this boat. Get some anti-depressants from your Dr. I have been on them for a while. I wish I had started sooner. I'm so sorry ! I know how hardi t is!
    chefjen

    Answer by chefjen at 6:52 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • When? When you start remembering her and not cry. It’s all too raw right now and it’s just something that you just have to go thru. There is no time schedule.

    Do take care of yourself. You will get thru it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:22 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • Thank you ladies so much.As for the one mom who has her moms stuff,I say keep it as long as you need to. So far I just have the one main thing I wanted that was my moms and its her wooden jewelry box that I played with when I was little.We havent gotten together to go through her stuff yet,but when we do I think we will give most of her clothes to the nursing home she was in.There are alot of people there who dont have much at all and when they get something they really appreciate it and I know thats what she would want us to do.
    4mom247

    Answer by 4mom247 at 7:38 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

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