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What would you do or say??

My dd Is 5 and yesterday her bio father lied to her face! He told her he would come and pick her up and keep her for the weekend. Well he didn't and now my dd keeps asking where he is and why he hasn't come nd seen her. I am just at a loss for words right now. So wat would you say?

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Asked by rachel216 at 8:33 AM on Jun. 9, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 21 (11,479 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • Tell her the truth.

    Answer by funlovinlady at 9:11 AM on Jun. 9, 2013

  • "Daddy lied to you. He isn't coming. I don't know where he is or why he hasn't come over. " I know the first inclination is to spare her the hurt, but if this becomes a habit with him, you'll be trying to cover for him for a long time. There's no reason you should have to lie to her too. The questions she's asking can only be answered by her dad. Don't make excuses for him.

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 9:14 AM on Jun. 9, 2013

  • If he does show up it is his responsibility to tell her if he had car trouble or whatever. Just be honest with her.

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 9:16 AM on Jun. 9, 2013

  • I don't make excuses for him anymore. He does this all the time. His sons mom( we talked yesterday) doesn't allow him to see their son bc him doing this to him. I told her idk where he is or why he didn't come see you. Her reply " but he misses me" that's one of the things he told her yesterday as well.. Ugh

    Comment by rachel216 (original poster) at 9:20 AM on Jun. 9, 2013

  • I would tell her when she talks to her Daddy next time. Ask him. That you do not know why he didn't come pick her up. You do not need to make up excuses for him.


    Answer by louise2 at 9:22 AM on Jun. 9, 2013

  • I would dial his number and give her the phone.. If he's not coming, he needs to man up and tell her. Once she is finished I would take the phone in private and tell him how bad what he is doing is hurting her and you will no longer allow it..

    Answer by midnightmoma at 9:58 AM on Jun. 9, 2013

  • I would just tell her something like "I am sorry it didn't work this time things happen, your daddy loves and misses you so much -should we go color a picture for him and send it/ should we go shopping/ go visit friends ? ........" Comfort her and help her to feel secure and loved. She might feel comfort drawing dad a picture or doing something for him. It sounds weird, but it is therapeutic and helps her to "feel" close. You are teaching her coping skills. She is still young enough to redirect.


    Answer by LeJane at 9:58 AM on Jun. 9, 2013

  • ^^^
    what LeJane suggested

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 10:21 AM on Jun. 9, 2013

  • He doesn't have a phone anymore the only way I have to get ahold of him is threw his roommate. And she's out playing with her lil sis now... We may try coloring after awhile she likes drawing and coloring ... We may write him a letter?? If she wants

    Comment by rachel216 (original poster) at 10:41 AM on Jun. 9, 2013

  • I think ambushing him at his house is the only way shell ever get an answer from him and even then it will be some bullshit excuse

    Comment by rachel216 (original poster) at 3:33 PM on Jun. 9, 2013

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