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Afraid of the dark???

My thirteen year old daughter is terrified of the dark? She always sleeps with her light on! Since her lava lamp broke she sleeps with her over head light on, and her night light. Where ever she goes in the house she turns every light on and leaves them on. She will not go into the basement for she thinks someone is down there constantly, she always believed in ghosts! I don't let her watch CSI or other dark crime shows like that, I don't let her watch ghost shows. Recently we had our power grid shutdown for work, but she was in a closed room and the lights were very suddenly shut off and I heard a glass shattering scream come from her she plugged her hears shut her eyes and started screaming very loudly! I get scared when she gets scared so I really need advice on how to deal with this. And also how to deal with her belief in ghosts!


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Asked by rls113 at 3:17 AM on Jun. 10, 2013 in Teens (13-17)

Level 4 (30 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • I would ask her why she is so afraid of the dark and go from there. Maybe talk to her doctor about ideas to try t help her out. I can relate. I am 30 and still sleep with my light on. I just do not like the dark.

    Answer by MooNFaeRie30 at 5:33 AM on Jun. 10, 2013

  • Our imaginations can wreak havoc on us sometimes. I'd sit down with her & find out the root cause of this fear she has. Then walk her thru these areas in the house during the daylight & point out how safe they are. And to save your electric bill, I think you should invest in a new night light for her room & maybe a few other strategically placed ones throughout the house. GL


    Answer by mrsmom110 at 6:29 AM on Jun. 10, 2013

  • Get her a wind up flash light. That way the batteries will never go out.

    Answer by louise2 at 6:47 AM on Jun. 10, 2013

  • I definitely think you need to find out why she's so scared of the dark. My 12 yr old still uses a night light and has no intentions (he's made this quite clear to me) of giving it up any time soon. But he's not absolutely terrified. If the power goes out, he's not thrilled, but he can manage. He'll walk through the house in the dark to get from his bedroom to the living room to turn on the light. Your daughter's fear is awfully intense and I think you need to find out what's caused/causing it, and depending on what it is, maybe a few visits with a therapist could help.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 7:03 AM on Jun. 10, 2013

  • You need to find out what is worsening her fear. Are her friends telling scary stories? Is she reading scary books? You might also want to check that she doesn't have a mental condition. If she's hearing voices, it could be schizophrenia. It doesn't sound like she has it, but better safe just to cross off the list. Do you go to church? If so, things said in church about heaven & hell etc. might be enough to get her imagination going. I remember this worsened my fear by being in a church service group and constantly hearing about spirits, heaven and hell. What has helped me tremendously was having a pet. My cats make small noises all the time at night so I usually think it's them and feel more safe knowing that if there really were spirits, the cats would be totally freaked out. It might help to give her a false sense of security with a cross necklace and a night light in her room.

    Answer by hellokittykat at 7:16 AM on Jun. 10, 2013

  • I can relate but I only have problems in doors. I have a problem with the quiet outside I am just fine. Address her confinement issues as well. For me it was the quiet and the confinement. Start off with the exercise there in the dark, there in the light. This gives her a place to start. sometimes its more about the quiet or the confinement. want to talk drop me a line.

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 7:21 AM on Jun. 10, 2013

  • P.S. Also fix the lights in your home so that they don't flicker. You need to get her to stop thinking about ghosts and spirits. If you have a deck or patio, try to have a few evening BBQs on the weekends so she can get used to the dark. Take a walk with her at night around the block if you think it's safe enough. Watch fun movies in the dark, so she can associate good feelings with the dark. This is called transference of emotions. The more fun and relaxing things that happen in the dark, the better she will feel. No harm in having a night light though at any age. I have several night lights even now just because I hate to stumble around in the dark whenever I get thirsty or need to use the bathroom at night. And also because cats really can't see that well at night.

    Answer by hellokittykat at 7:24 AM on Jun. 10, 2013

  • I still don't like the dark as an adult and will turn lights on as I walk though the house (and will turn another one on before I turn one off). The screaming is a bit overboard though. Could she have just been being dramatic? If she's really THAT terrified suggest a therapist to her, see what her reaction is then.

    Answer by maecntpntz219 at 9:13 AM on Jun. 10, 2013

  • My oldest brother is 56 and scared of the dark. He remembers playing with his friends as a child and getting locked in an outhouse. Has been afraid since than.

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 12:34 PM on Jun. 10, 2013

  • I don't like the dark either but I am able to sleep in the dark but I get freaked walking in the dark

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 12:43 PM on Jun. 10, 2013

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