Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

My 14 year old son has gotten deeply into rap music. He's not the same sweet boy I raised - is it the music or his hormones?

Answer Question
 
dolobono

Asked by dolobono at 10:09 PM on Feb. 17, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Both. You should guard what he listens to. If he likes rap you should approve anything he wants to buy or hear. There are great rap artist out there with positive messages but they aren't usually on the radio. I'm very much into conscious and Christian hip hop artists so if you need ideas message me.

    MamaChamp

    Answer by MamaChamp at 10:12 PM on Feb. 17, 2009

  • No one has more influence over your children than you do. The music will not influence him enough to make him a bad person. You need to step in and talk to him about what he's listening to, what he thinks of the subject matter, and really be prepared to LISTEN to how he's feeling.

    Talk to your child. Be open, don't judge him. Just listen.
    catwalksymphony

    Answer by catwalksymphony at 2:40 AM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • hormones. I grew up listening to heavy metal music. I have not killed anyone, burned crosses, do not worship the devil and all the other negative things associated with this type of music. Anyone who equates the type of music to doing horrible things need to realize that music is a form of expression and not the devil do all that's associted with it. If you go out and do something horrible after listening to music I can guarantee you had severe mental and emotional problems before hand.
    pagirl71

    Answer by pagirl71 at 9:16 AM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • I would say both but the hormones more than the music. While music can have some influence on children, I think in the end, if they were raised right, the music won't matter. My cousin and I used to listen to Marilyn Manson (and I still do if it comes on the radio) but we never got into the whole dress like a dead person thing! I also listened to rap and went through the phases but I was young and i realized it's stupid to try and be someone you're not. I would say keep talking to your son, don't try and ban the music because he'll only rebel, just give it a listen and if you find it's disrespectful, talk to him about it. Ask why he likes it and if he thinks everything these people are rapping about is true. Good Luck!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:41 AM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • We have a 12 yr old son, he loves all types of music but overall he likes the alternative rock, it can be vulgar, cuss words, etc... Loves Metallica, heavy metal etc... We love all of that as well so I think if you don't make a big deal over it niether will your son.. I have always made sure my son learns to appreciate music as that, music... The people aren't singing it to change anyones life, they are singing it to make a lot of money and for the love of the art... Just like the fact that our son loves to draw and some of them can be a little strange, I have told him to put his energy towards using his talent to grow and learn so that maybe one day his talent will earn him a great living and take him anywhere he wants to go....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:43 AM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • It's a phase.
    kimberleee382

    Answer by kimberleee382 at 1:17 PM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • I say both as well. I have a 14 yr old daughter that has developed a liking for this type of music as well and I HATE IT. The lyrics are vulgar and nasty and anyone who says it doesnt affect us or how we think, is terribly wrong. That being said, I don;t think you can just go in like a warden and tear up his cds or ipod. I think you need to sit down with him and show him how those lyrics arent okay and how they depict life. Its unrealistic. I haven't made a huge deal about it, but I don't allow it in my truck or in my player. She has an ipod for a reason. My dad is a pastor and I was raised in and around the things of God all my life. I loved music like Def Leppard, Bon Jovi, ect. I think it was because i knew my dad wouldn't agree...LOL...Nevertheless one day, I got old enough to say..hey, this hurts my fathers heart and he would not approve. I began opening my musical horizons. I still love the 80s' though...
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 1:38 PM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • The hormones! I agree with the above postings that if you instill good values then music won't just change who they are. Do you know why he listens to rap? Maybe he likes the beats? Maybe some of the songs have lyrics that he can relate to on an emotional level? Even if he didn't grow up in a poor neighborhood or deal drugs, etc, doesn't mean he can't connect with the feelings of rap music artists. Maybe he justs likes the song? What teenage boy doesn't want to hear about girls shaking their money makers? LOL..
    ozarkgirl3

    Answer by ozarkgirl3 at 8:18 PM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • Both. While I can't stand rap nowadays because it seems to be so objectifying, regulating what he listens to won't do any good. It didn't for me. My mom kept saying "it's a phase.." But it wasn't Metal just happens to be the type of music I like. Maybe rap is just the type of music your son likes. Just make sure you keep raising your son properly and make sure he doesn't confuse music with life. Music is music. It's just entertainment.
    SinaiJ

    Answer by SinaiJ at 4:27 AM on Mar. 26, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in General Parenting
naked

Next question overall (Relationships)
im in a rut..i need advice

close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN