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Help with the in laws

My hubby and I have been together for 7 years. When I met him he already had 4 nieces and nephews and in the next two years he had 4 more. We have always bought them gifts for birthdays and christmas and chocolates at easter etc.
We now have a son of our own who just celebrated his 2nd birthday, but hubby's sisters (and mother) never seem to get him anything. For the past 2 Christmases birthdays and Easters my son misses out. But they continue to expect for their kids... How can I fix this.


I'm not trying to sound greedy I would appreciate if he even received a card from them but its hard when he sees his cousins get presents but not him

Answer Question
 
Worriedmummy

Asked by Worriedmummy at 11:03 PM on Jun. 13, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 1 (2 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • its hard when he sees his cousins get presents but not him
    at what? like a family party and he isnt getting anything while the others are cleaning up?

    stop going to the parties

    has DH spoken to his family in private?
    feralxat

    Answer by feralxat at 11:07 PM on Jun. 13, 2013

  • Cut back on the gift buying for the nieces and nephews. I know it's not all about reciprocating, but it's unfair to your son and disrespectful to your family if your husband's siblings are leaving your kid out.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 11:12 PM on Jun. 13, 2013

  • We have family functions at Christmas and all the kids sit down at the tree and each family gives out their presents in turns and I sit there with my son as he reaches for presents that are being handed to the child next to him.
    If I stop going to parties they come to the house to collect the presents they assume we have (tried it before) and eat everything I have and make a mess.
    My hubby is worried that he will offend them but trust me they will be more than offended if I end up having to say something
    Worriedmummy

    Comment by Worriedmummy (original poster) at 11:13 PM on Jun. 13, 2013

  • I would start buying very small gifts. I mean like five bucks... but that's just me.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 11:31 PM on Jun. 13, 2013

  • Either stop doing presents at all or buy gifts for your child, too, so he will have something to open. This is your husband 's to handle. First rule of marriage: He handles his family; you handle yours.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 11:38 PM on Jun. 13, 2013

  • hubs needs to talk to them
    and dont let them in your house- you pay the rent and buy the food it isnt theirs for the taking
    and if hubs is going to let them come in and mess up your home, then go for a walk while he cleans it up


     


    check out this group for key talking points with him. the gifts sound indicative of a larger issue

    feralxat

    Answer by feralxat at 12:11 AM on Jun. 14, 2013

  • I think if they showed up I wouldn't have the gifts, and I would just say "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought we weren't exchanging gifts, did you get some for my son??? I"m so embarrassed!"
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 1:04 AM on Jun. 14, 2013

  • Buy them some dollar store shit.
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 1:36 AM on Jun. 14, 2013

  • Don't buy anymore, tell your husband he needs to stand up for your child and how unfair he is being treated. If they come over uninvited tell them you are sorry but you don't have anything planned to entertain and have no food.

    And say EXACTLY what Ohwrite said.
    tntmom1027

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 2:10 AM on Jun. 14, 2013

  • If it's simply that they can't afford to buy gifts for all of the nieces/nephews, suggest that the kids draw names at holidays to buy for each other. We started doing that with my husband's family when the number of grandkids hit 13. It was just too much.
    Ginger0104

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 2:34 AM on Jun. 14, 2013

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