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3 Bumps

Did you marry someone even though the sex was bad? adult content

I feel in love with my husband but he is bad at making love. 98% of the time their is no big O. And he is selfish, always wants me to give him Oral and has the nerve to just want that and nothing for me if he had it his way he would always be pleased and never lift a finger. I know he is capable to give me a O if he works really hard but he says it takes to long. Really cause I think you just need practice. I have even told him he is lazy and he tries for a time or two then back to lazy. The bad thing is he isn't lazy in life super hard worker great husband provider and father. I have really given up. He even bought me toys to do for myself. What to do? I mean I have never met a man that only wanted sex 4 to 5 times a month if he actually has to do it. Seriously any tips that don't require me doing ALL the work and make him a better "partner"

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:08 AM on Jun. 16, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (22)
  • Sorry, I've only ever had sex with one man, and he's not selfish at all :/

    I hope you can sit him down and talk to him and make him realize how selfish he is being, and that a true relationship is give and take.

    Also, do you use those toys during your play time with him?

    Answer by hopeandglory53 at 12:24 AM on Jun. 16, 2013

  • Sex has never been easy for me. I'd be glad to do it four or five times a month or less. The only tip I can give you after years of dealing with pelvic pain is to tell him exactly what you like. If you want the Big O, tell him how to get you there. Slower, faster, harder, not so hard, go in circles, more lube, straight up and down--you may feel like you're navigating a ship at first instead of enjoying a hand or tongue job, but giving him the info will pay off. I know from having two partners who have had frustrations at how long it takes me that they were glad to have tips about what I needed.

    Answer by Ballad at 12:25 AM on Jun. 16, 2013

  • I did not marry my husband for sex. It was part of the bargain and one perk I happen to enjoy but I did not have sex with him before I married, so I would not have had that info at that time. We did our share of exploring before the fact and that gave an indication of what kind of a person and lover he would be.

    Answer by Dardenella at 12:57 AM on Jun. 16, 2013

  • Nope. Not married.

    Answer by staciandababy at 1:07 AM on Jun. 16, 2013

  • Your husband is 100% selfish.
    STOP giving him blowjobs.
    That being said, your orgasm is mostly your responsibility. Why can't you get on top and ride him till you cum? Why aren't you implementing the toys into foreplay or intercourse? Why haven't you taken a more active role?

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 1:40 AM on Jun. 16, 2013

  • If you know he is this way. Take care of your O yourself.

    Answer by louise2 at 7:24 AM on Jun. 16, 2013

  • NO

    Answer by 3libras at 9:15 AM on Jun. 16, 2013

  • No

    Answer by DJDNY at 10:00 AM on Jun. 16, 2013

  • are the two of you 69 capable?

    Answer by hibbingmom at 10:20 AM on Jun. 16, 2013

  • PS to answer your original question I married someone without having sex with them 1st. I was not initially loving what I got myself into but one doesn't divorce for oops the sex is lame. We celebrate 10 years this fall and it has improved vastly with blunt awkward talks, time, and patience

    Answer by hibbingmom at 10:22 AM on Jun. 16, 2013

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