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As a favor I'm watching two of my sister in laws friends daughters. During this summer I am trying to do whatever I can to keep them busy without breaking the bank. I have two of my own. However, my attempts go unappreciated. These girls are never thankful, they can never just play together. Their always arguing and being rude. Please any suggestions to help me make them happy.

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trying2bsuper

Asked by trying2bsuper at 3:47 PM on Jun. 18, 2013 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 2 (11 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • well one, if you want something to do with them then their parents should pay for it.
    LostSoul88

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 3:51 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • How about 1 last warning before kicking them to the curb?! You are doing their mother a favor. That does not include putting up w/ ungrateful, ill-mannered brats. If they have toys, outside activities like chalk, bubbles, jump-ropes & a ball, that should be good. Maybe go to a local park to let them play on the playground & pack a picnic lunch. But I would not reward their bad behavior. If they haven't earned special activities, let them know why. GL

    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 3:51 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • It's a learned behavior to appreciate what others do for you. I would make them do things for other people if they start arguing or complaining. If worse comes to worse, they just stop coming to your house. The best thing that could happen is that they learn a little from you that they might not be getting at home.


    The other thing I have found helpful is trying to find an even number of kids to play. Odd numbers usually mean that someone gets left out and that causes complaining and fighting. Even numbers increase the likelihood that they will break into groups and play separately but peacefully.

    QuinnMae

    Answer by QuinnMae at 3:53 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • I would love to pass on the cost to the mother but, she just returned to work from maternity leave after having a new baby with her new boyfriend. I do give them warnings and explain the actives will be taken away, but this doesn't stop them. I feel bad because the are from a bad divorce and both parents have new relationships and these girls are getting the short end of the stick.
    trying2bsuper

    Comment by trying2bsuper (original poster) at 3:56 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • Before I completely gave up and told the parents I'm not doing this any more, I would try separating them every time they argue. Make them sit some place where there is nothing to look at and nothing to do. Tell them you want them to think about ways they can get along with each other while they are sitting. Then ask them for an answer before they are allowed to get up. If they don't tell you something, make them sit longer. You can start with as long as you like, and then add to it as you like. This will sometimes work. If it doesn't, I would tell the parents I'm not keeping them any longer and why. There's no reason you should be punished for trying to do a good deed.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 3:57 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • That's no excuse for letting them be rude. Have your own rules in your house. If you don't like their attitude, make them sit down and make cards for elderly people in nursing homes, or for soldiers that are serving overseas. Make them think beyond themselves and what they are going through. While it might be a bad situation, coddling them will just enable their rudeness. Teach them compassion and they will carry that forever.
    And just because someone else has a bad situation doesn't mean they don't have responsibility in the matter. The mother should be contributing something to her kid's care.
    Maybe look into your local library for some daytime activities for school aged kids. Those are usually free (just require you to sign up) and keep them busy and gives you a little relief.
    QuinnMae

    Answer by QuinnMae at 4:00 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • Thanks ladies for all suggestions. I will take all your advise and see if it helps. If things don't get better soon I think it's come to a point where my kids should come first and I can no longer stress over pleasing other people's kids. I can't save the world when I need to focus on my own back yard.
    trying2bsuper

    Comment by trying2bsuper (original poster) at 4:02 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • Feeling bad is no excuse for allowing bad behavior.
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 4:40 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • 1) good behavior charts are wonderful things. Everyone fills the behavior chart and Friday you can go _____.
    2)Set a very strict routine for the day inducing what days you will be going to do things.
    3)make sure to include some times to themselves. Time to work on something on their own. (ie. coloring books, puzzles, books, small toys in separate areas)
    4)Even if they are to old for naps they are not to old for a quiet time. They can all lay down on a blanket on the floor for 30-40 minutes during the day.
    5)check you local libraries and community/city calendars for free and low cost events. Don't just look in your city! check all of them with in a reasonable distance.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 5:45 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • Make your own events!
    have everyone make their own sandwiches and go to the park
    Work together to create a dance party w/ home made decorations and everything
    Bake cookies and decorate them- Then take them to the Fire Station
    Go hiking on a near by trail. - turn it into a nature scavenger hunt
    Fill a large container with water and give them measuring cups to scoop and measure (outside of course)
    Paint the sidewalk with water and a paintbrush
    Use a milk carton with the top cut off to make a HUGE ice cube. Let them try to melt it.
    Create obstacle courses and relays - make your own Olympics!
    Learn new songs then go sing them at a nursing home
    Make Cards for children in your local Hospital- then if allowed- deliver them.
    Create a teddy bear picnic- let them help you pick a healthy menu and make the foods


    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 5:52 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

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