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3 Bumps

How long after a divorce...

Were you in a serious relationship? Or had a child? or got remarried? I got with my boyfriend right after my divorce. So Most of my family doesn't like him the best bc they wanted me to stay married, knowing I wasn't happy. anyways, I am very happy now! Been with him 2 years in August. We are already living together, and have been for quite awhile. We are house shopping. Just wondering when you would get engaged, married or have a baby? To be honest, I'm not in a huge hurry for a wedding, but probably bc I already have had one and he hasn't. I have a son, and I want more children. I don't want them to far apart so I would like to have them. I just get pressure or influenced from family to take my time, and make sure I know what i'm doing. And I do believe I am and do know what I'm doing this time. I'm way older and mature. I was barely 21 when I married. My sister is getting married next Sept. I'm debating, do we hurry up and rush a child, or wait til after their wedding. Obviously I'm in it, don't wanna be fat & pregnant. But not too sure I wanna be chubby from newborn either. Lol. Just looking for suggestions. Please no harsh comments, I get enough of them around here. Lol Thanks

Answer Question
 
Ambie0526

Asked by Ambie0526 at 4:07 PM on Jun. 18, 2013 in Relationships

Level 16 (2,562 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • get married and have a baby when you and your boyfriend are ready, not when your family is. There really is no time line for it.
    LostSoul88

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 4:11 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • I would wait until I was Married & settled before I had another Child. There is no rush. A year or two will not make a difference. Why rush through life?
    ILovemyPaulie

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 4:12 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • I was probably divorced a year before I started dating anyone else.
    AnonNdrag

    Answer by AnonNdrag at 4:16 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • I've dated some but, I'll be divorced for 3 yrs in Sept, and I still haven't had a "serious" relationship. At least not someone I'd consider a SO or have meet my children.
    3libras

    Answer by 3libras at 4:47 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • Got divorced when I was 20, met my husband when I was 25 didn't get married or live with each other until I was 30 had kids after we got married, why rush it, enjoy your self
    2kids2dogs2cats

    Answer by 2kids2dogs2cats at 6:07 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • I've been divorced for 10 yrs this coming October. In that time, I've had 1 serious relationship and 2 less serious relationships. I've dated off and on, and the first date after my divorce was with a guy I'd been friends with for 5-6 years, about 3 weeks after my divorce was final. It wasn't a big deal, just a casual date. He knew how bad my marriage was and basically just wanted to remind me that not all guys were jerks.

    If you think you're doing what's best for you, then that's really all that matters. Don't worry about what your family thinks.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 6:07 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • I have in my past jumped from one man to another. No time being single in between. Didn't work for me. Between my EX DH. And my current DH there was 3years I was single. I have been married for 24 years now. I just hope you are really ready for it.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 6:13 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • I was in a serious relationship about a year after my divorce. Personally I think it's best to spend some time alone after a marriage to acknowledge and correct your part in the breakup, why you chose the man you chose to marry. If we don't work through our problems we are destined to repeat them. Then we dated for a couple years before getting married and having kids, we didn't live together before we married.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 6:16 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • I was divorced about a year and a half when I got into a serious relationship. I didn't intend to ever get in another relationship at all, but life happens. You know your own mind. Don't let others determine your path for you; I find they usually aren't very good at it. And don't decide when to have a baby around how you'll look in your sister's wedding. If she's worth standing up with, she won't care what your belly looks like.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 7:18 PM on Jun. 18, 2013

  • awww, not bashing. Just take your time and be DEFINITE that he IS the one. He needs a great paying job. Has he goingh to college? Its nice to have that completed before having more kids and never being able to do it because there is no time and the kids are demanding. Plan well :)
    NicolesMommy

    Answer by NicolesMommy at 8:57 PM on Jun. 19, 2013

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