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2 Bumps

How would you answer the question to someone who's bipolar?

I just had my 9 year old DS evaluated for ADHD. It was a very in-depth process and included family history. I thought nothing of it when asked if my mother suffered from depression. I said yes, and then he asked about bipolar, and I said maybe.

This morning I left her a copy of the report, without even thinking about that being in there. Now she's furious and says that she is not bipolar, nor does she suffer from depression. In all honesty, she's a nut. She could be incredibly giddy one minute and then in the depths of despair the next. And then she asked me if I thought she was bipolar. I'm 34 and still afraid of her wrath, so I said I'm not a professional and can't make that diagnosis. I'm just thinking, it might not be safe to tell someone who's bipolar that they're bipolar. Crap.

So she's now calling around to my family telling them that I said she's bipolar. And she'll probably stop talking to me for a few weeks. Good times.

Answer Question

Asked by ABeaverhausen at 9:26 AM on Jun. 19, 2013 in Relationships

Level 24 (21,466 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • My brother is an unmediated bipolar. I avoid him at all cost. I don't even bother trying to talk to him, he as well is a nut case. He is his ass self one minute and a violent nut case the next. I refuses to leave my kids alone with him.

    Answer by LostSoul88 at 9:32 AM on Jun. 19, 2013

  • I wouldn't worry about her calling around to the family. They must all know she is unstable. I'd just let her go through it and just go on withmy own life. You are an adult with the right to your opinion of her behavior and you were obligated to be honest with your son's therapist. They ask those questions for a reason.

    Answer by Nimue930 at 9:41 AM on Jun. 19, 2013

  • She could be Axis II without being bi-polar. There are similarities. It sounds like she does have some type of issue or she wouldn't have reacted that way. It's possible she has not been officially diagnosed. How would I answer her? I'd simply say they asked you family history (that question specifically) and you just wondered if it ran in the family that she knows of.Keep it general and not like she's being accused of anything.

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:03 AM on Jun. 19, 2013

  • Considering what you think of her, I would not have given her the report at all

    Answer by Dardenella at 11:54 AM on Jun. 19, 2013

  • See, this is why I'm glad that all the crazy people in my family are either dead or really far away from me. lol

    Truthfully, I was asked the same questions when I was getting my oldest diagnosed with ADHD. We do have a history of depression and bipolar in the family, but it's been discussed frequently and none of my family gets all up in arms over it. It's just a fact that we're aware of and deal with.

    I wouldn't worry about your mother. I'm sure everyone else is aware of her instability, and consider, too, that maybe part of why she's so upset is that she knows that she is, but doesn't want to admit it. Your acknowledgement of it, even as just a maybe, is making her aware that others realize it, too, which makes it harder for her to continue to pretend that she's fine.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 1:40 PM on Jun. 19, 2013

  • Consider it a vacation. Time off will do you good. After that never never tell her anything at all.

    Answer by LoveMyDog at 4:00 PM on Jun. 19, 2013

  • Ignore here it isn't going to help to try and say anything, this coming from a person who is bipolar lol. If she is rapidly changing moods it could also be a personality disorder issue.

    good luck lol

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 6:09 PM on Jun. 19, 2013

  • Oh no, poor thing! Tell me that you DON'T live with her. Most bipolar people will not admit it

    Answer by NicolesMommy at 8:51 PM on Jun. 19, 2013

  • The mentally ill generally react with denial. It's not your job to prove anything. Her behavior speaks for itself. Consider the possibility of her not talking to you a blessing in disguise. Don't share any further details of your or your family's life with her because she'll likely seek revenge passive aggressively. Don't get trapped into the roller coaster of emotions that they go on.

    Answer by hellokittykat at 4:30 AM on Jun. 20, 2013

  • Thankfully, I don't live with her! lol OMG I can't even imagine.

    She called me last night to cry & yell. It just always takes me back to feeling like a kid where she's got all the power. She's absolutely furious with me. But to be honest, I just don't see how she can't see it. My siblings & I are always afraid to call her because we don't know what kind of mood she'll be in. But when we don't call, we get an earful. I should know by now, there's no winning. Maybe, (doubt it), this will move her toward treatment?

    Comment by ABeaverhausen (original poster) at 8:15 AM on Jun. 20, 2013

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