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Respecting my mom

She is always going to the doctor,not liking what they say and going to another. She sits around the house all day only goes out when she has to. She says her neck is messed up and she has white matter on her brain. I would like to suggest that she get out and start walking but she will just use the "you have your hormones" rant so I get nowhere. She's 67 yrs old. She does have high blood pressure,high cholesterol,and high tryglicerides. I us eto have all that to till I got off my butt. Yes I have my hormones but she can't keep using excuses. She has lost control of her money so now she has a payee who gives her little bits here and there. My sister who's just about 30 won't get off her butt and work,yet they keep asking for money for things like fish oil with dha,tylenol,tampons,you name it they ask. I told my sis she could be a better supporter if she would get a job. I have four kids and don't have money to run off and help them. Not sure what to do.
Then today I guess my brother went over to my moms house and he said he needed to leave so he could get austen (my sons money) and she texts me asking for my 17 yr old to give her money. I told her he can't do that he is trying to save for a car so he can go to college in august. I just don't know how to get her to listen and comply.

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:00 PM on Jun. 22, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • have you contacted you local elderly services and asked for some relief/ protection

    she sounds mental and in need of protection

    and dont allow anyone to usurp your childs money!

    Answer by feralxat at 10:14 PM on Jun. 22, 2013

  • You can respect your mom, but that doesn't mean you have to finance her. Just say no. N-o, no. Practice it in front of the mirror. Why should your sister get a job if you're going to be the bank? Draw the line at them taking your son's college money. Channel your inner Nancy Reagan and just say no!

    Answer by Ballad at 11:02 PM on Jun. 22, 2013

  • You could bring her to counseling to get the message across. When people get older, their brain doesn't work the same way. They can't reason as well, lose inhibitions, etc. The more forceful communication you use, the more likely she won't listen. You need to think wisely, use baby steps, treat her like you are convincing a child. First, get her to trust you. Then, make it seem like it was her idea to protect herself and her money. A trained professional will know best how to approach her. I don't think it's a good idea for her to walk if she's old and has neck problems, especially not alone. When I dealt with physical pain, I didn't want to do much either. I am telling you, she's probably feeling depressed that they can't figure out what's wrong or give her an effective treatment. She needs to find one good doctor she can trust. I dealt with several useless docs before. I feel her pain.

    Answer by hellokittykat at 11:09 PM on Jun. 22, 2013

  • Talk to her doctor yourself. Sounds like she cannot care for herself any longer.

    Answer by gdiamante at 11:13 AM on Jun. 23, 2013

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