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Is it just the way it is?

I'm sure my friends are getting tired of me talking about it and besides my parents, I don't think anyone realizes what I went through being married to someone so awful. My friends how's things going? and then I try to keep it simple and get all sad and start missing my son. ( because I'm usually more than likely hanging out with friends because I don't have him) I think people ask hows it's going but I don't think they really care to understand, they just ask. but they want a simple great. doing good answer wouldn't you agree?

 
Sillylins

Asked by Sillylins at 11:47 AM on Jun. 24, 2013 in Relationships

Level 27 (31,211 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • It really depends on the person asking. I have a friend I've known since we were in high school. We both know if one of us asks "How are you?", we don't want "Doing great!" unless that's the truth. We want to hear "my job sucks, the kids won't behave, my husband stayed up late playing video games and ignored our anniversary" and all that crap. But other friends, I know even if they ask how I'm doing, it's no different than the grocery store cashier asking me - it's a small talk question, a polite way to start a conversation, and they don't want to know all my problems.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 12:55 PM on Jun. 24, 2013

  • Depends on the friendship. Some are probably asking to be nice and want a simple happy answer. Some friends will be genuinely concerned and want to know how you're honestly doing.
    JulieJacobKyle

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 11:49 AM on Jun. 24, 2013

  • depends on the level of friendship and also the privacy level you guys have when asked... I generally will say "not really. wanna grab coffee tomorrow?" or something

    hibbingmom

    Answer by hibbingmom at 11:50 AM on Jun. 24, 2013

  • I don't know. I guess the issue is that nobody can do anything to change the situation for you. They probably don't know how to help so they just listen. Maybe they think they are helping by trying to not indulge in talking about something that will result in making you sad.
    QuinnMae

    Answer by QuinnMae at 12:41 PM on Jun. 24, 2013

  • I agree; it really depends. Some casual acquaintances want the small talk answer. But if I ask one of my closer friends how she's doing, I want the truth and she knows it.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 3:42 PM on Jun. 24, 2013

  • As others have said it all depends on how close your friends are as to what answer to give. My closest friends are the few people who I would confide things to and when they ask how are you they expect to hear the full truth and are there to listen and give support. Casual friends I keep it short and simple and respond with a general "things are going ok" and leave it at that.
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 10:46 AM on Jun. 25, 2013

  • Thanks Ladies!! I kind of figured the same thing, but I just wanted to confirm.
    Sillylins

    Comment by Sillylins (original poster) at 5:34 PM on Jun. 25, 2013

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