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Why'd he say that & what does it mean?

I have a friends with benefits / for years now.
But frieday night, he tells me he wants to get me pregnant. We've already talked about how my tubes are tied, my youngest is 13. We've always used condoms.

Is he wanting more?

I'm freaked that he'd say that.
I said, I'm too old and I was looking forward to the days if no kids. Meaning: their grown up and self sufficient

Ugh ????

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:17 PM on Jul. 7, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Maybe he never had kids and wants one. Maybe he was kidding. Maybe he wanted to shock you. Maybe he wants to break up and that's the only issue he can think of worth plitting over. Nobody knows but him, and you won't know till you ask him.

    Answer by Ballad at 8:24 PM on Jul. 7, 2013

  • Why don't you ask him?

    Answer by 3libras at 8:25 PM on Jul. 7, 2013

  • Ask him. A reversal is serious surgery and sometimes doesn't work. Not worth the risk for a FWB Especially if you said you were done.

    He's testing your reaction.

    Answer by Izsarejman at 8:35 PM on Jul. 7, 2013

  • He commentented that is be invited back - in another conversation.
    No he does not have kids. Just wierd...
    He invited me over - if he wanted to break things off - he would not call - don't you think?

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:13 PM on Jul. 7, 2013

  • My youngest is 12. I had my tubes tied when he was a little over a year old. I've been divorced for almost 3 yrs and the man I am currently in a committed relationship with has no kids. From time to time, he says that he would like kids and that he would like me to be the mother of his child. But then we talk about reality. I'm 35 and he is 31. That means if I got pregnant today, I would be 54 when that child turns 18. People would mistake him and I for the child's grandparents. That isn't fair to the child and I REALLY don't want to start over.

    Maybe a part of him wants to have kids. Maybe he wants to have a more committed relationship with you. I don't know. All I can tell you is that you need to be honest with yourself and then be honest with him about what you want out of this relationship.

    Answer by tempsingl3mom at 9:49 PM on Jul. 7, 2013

  • Did you talk with him about it? Does he want to get you pregnant and wants to be a father? Will he continue to be your friend with benefits or is he interested in making a family?

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 10:49 PM on Jul. 7, 2013

  • Maybe he's expressing feelings about "wanting more."
    He may have been sharing an impulse, (wanting to get you pregnant) that indicates feelings & wishes. Not JUST about having a child/family, but about wanting something different/more with you.
    That would be my thought. It sounds like a moment of candor, and intimacy.
    Wanting a baby doesn't always translate to actually wanting a child. A person can be ambivalent and ultimately NOT want a baby (or another baby) but still have strong feelings of wanting, or a quick, surprising impulse of wanting or longing, or a thought.

    Answer by girlwithC at 2:37 PM on Jul. 8, 2013

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