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A few years ago me and girl whom I thought was my best lost contact with each other then reconnected recently on fb. within those past few years of not talkin or seeing each other she has gotten married and started a family. which is a plus, but she now she acts as if we were never friends. she doesn't call, txt or keep in touch with me. so has she out grown our friendship or was she never my best friend to begin with?

We used to hang out, go clubbing, out to eat, we shared clothes our families were cool. We talked about everything. Now since she has gotten married she has no contact with me.

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jen4244

Asked by jen4244 at 11:34 PM on Jul. 7, 2013 in Relationships

Level 4 (52 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Sounds like you have grown apart. It happens. Also, she may have just grown up. She probably doesn't have the time to spend chatting on the phone or the desire to hang out in a club now.
    JulieJacobKyle

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 11:43 PM on Jul. 7, 2013

  • Something similar happened to me. It seemed like after I had my son she wanted nothing to do with me. Guess I just wasn't fun anymore since I couldn't do whatever I wanted whenever I wanted and had responsibilities.
    Lobelia

    Answer by Lobelia at 11:48 PM on Jul. 7, 2013

  • I'm married myself I dnt hang out anymore. I work two jobs
    jen4244

    Comment by jen4244 (original poster) at 11:55 PM on Jul. 7, 2013

  • You know, people just get to different places in their livs. I have a very dear friend I met in high school. We used to spend loads of time together. Then I had a baby and started a business and she took a job with a nonprofit charity for street kids and got married to a man who already had five children, and life got busy. We still care about each other very much, and when we do visit, we pick up right where we left off. We'd drop everything for each other if we needed do. But we maybe e-mail once or twice a month, talk on the phone less than that, and get together a few times a year.

    If you miss your friend, how about suggesting that your families do something together, or calling to see if she'd like to have a quick lunch or go for coffee? Maybe set up a play date for your kids if they're close in age. Find new things you can have in common, since clubbing and chatting on the phone may not work for he anymore.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 11:55 PM on Jul. 7, 2013

  • My best friend and I took 2 different paths. I had a kid, she ended up in rehab.
    Had I not gotten pregnant, I probably would have been right there with her.
    If I met her today, we would not get along, I would not give her my phone number. But we have history, and when one of us really needs their bestie, we are there for each other. We've been friends for 35 years.

    How long would you consider this person your best friend? Maybe she thinks you're still the crazy club kid? How far do you live from one another?

    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 1:09 AM on Jul. 8, 2013

  • We met at a job back in 2000. We automatically clicked with one another. I'm very picky with whom I befriend, so she had to be a pretty awesome person. She was a lot like me in so many ways. Honest and kind hearted, would give you the shirt off her back. I tried talking to her letting know that I was working and in a serious relationship, and helping my kids out with school and work. I let her know that I really dnt do much of anything but work, you know same as her. Even told her to keep intouch, and that I missed her and her son. But still no word. I'm not exactly sure where she lives, but I do know that we both stay in the same city. Should I try to contact her again?
    jen4244

    Comment by jen4244 (original poster) at 1:41 AM on Jul. 8, 2013

  • You might have just grown apart. Or maybe you're just both busy. And you don't necessarily have to talk every day. I'm still friends with my best friend from high school - but we don't necessarily talk every day. We get together sometimes (more during the summer than the rest of the year), we comment on and like statuses on Facebook, and text each other now and then. But if we don't talk, comment, like or text for a few days or even weeks, I don't freak out that we're not friends anymore. We both have kids, work, etc. It keeps us busy.

    You could try contacting her again, but I'd probably make it the last time, unless she starts reciprocating contact. Otherwise, you'll just end up looking desperate, and come off as annoying.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 7:37 AM on Jul. 8, 2013

  • sadly you've grown apart. Sometimes our lives get taken this way and that way and we don't keep in touch with the people we once did. Those friendships are never forgotten but sometimes it's best to cherish the memories and if she really wanted to be in touch she would, if you asked her for you guys to go out sometime and she doesn't respond, then let it be.
    good luck!
    Sillylins

    Answer by Sillylins at 5:26 PM on Jul. 8, 2013

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