My boyfriend and I came home from Wal-Mart to find a mammoth mess on the carpet because my dog had another accident. She's getting old and having bowel issues. So we were sitting together on the floor with scrub brushes and Resolve. Trying to make the situation not seem so bad, I told my boyfriend that if he hadn't been there, I would have had to grope around with plastic bags on my hands, gagging, to investigate the scope of the mess and then clean it up as best I could without seeing it. I said I'd done it many times and was glad I didn't have to do it now. I was trying to let him know that I appreciated his help, but also that I could have managed without him, so that he didn't feel that I saw him as a convenience. But he took it that I was telling him I didn't really need him and that there was nothing he did for me that I couldn't do by myself if I had to. Which I suppose is true, I could, with a whole lot more effort. But that wasn't where my thoughts were going at all.
So have you ever tried to say something positive and ended up sticking your foot down your throat?
It sounds more like he is having male PMS and being sensitive. Maybe he feels that you're too independent and that it makes him feel useless. But I don't think what you said was offensive. He might have felt this way even before this happened. As for the dog issue, have you tried puppy pads or doggie diapers or putting him a carpetless room temporarily (if you have one)?
Here is a diaper made for senior dogs with medical issues:
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