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2 Bumps

My kids are out of control

I just don't know what to do anymore I feel like my kids are out of control. My daughter is 5 and my son is 3. I have to get up each morning and do a walk through of the house to see what they have done when they should of been sleeping like everyone else. I have found messes like....they broke a dozen eggs all over the carpet in the closet, water all over the bathroom/kitchen floor on several occasions, putting half roll of toilet paper in the toilet and clogging it several times, getting condiments and smearing them all over the kitchen floor, spilled pop in several places, my son whips it out and pees all over floors and furniture. They also play with computers, ipads, cell phones even after being told not to several times, they will go as far as plugging stuff in to try to get it on to play with it. Just last night after we put them to bed my husband and I went in our room to watch a movie. I came out afterwards to let the dog out and lock up my vehicle and I couldn't find my keys so I looked around and I found the KFC bucket of chicken from supper earlier, empty. So I thought ok where did 5 huge pieces of chicken go(we put the rest in the fridge), so I looked around and found a mini Lightning McQueen backpack with all the chicken in it and threw it all away and then I found my keys underneath all that.
I have tried time out, corner, throwing toys away, putting all toys up, no TV, I hate to spank but I have even tried that. I've tried any kind of baby proofing thing too. I've tried fridge latches, door knob covers, baby gates you name it I've tried it.
I need help I am at a loss on what to do. I am tired of cleaning up the messes (I cant get them to help, when I try they scream at me and throw things at me or hit me)
What can I do??????

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:17 AM on Jul. 8, 2013 in General Parenting

Answers (10)
  • Who let them get this out of control?
    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 10:23 AM on Jul. 8, 2013

  • What have you tried so far?
    goldpandora

    Answer by goldpandora at 10:30 AM on Jul. 8, 2013

  • When you "try" they scream, throw, and hit. Well, the first problem is you shouldn't be trying. You should be taking charge as a parent and making them do, not attempting to make them do. If that means you have to stand over them and direct every little thing they do, then that's what you do.

    How long do you sleep that they can get up and do this much damage before you get up? It sounds to me like maybe you need to make sure they're asleep before you go to sleep, and set an alarm to get up before them. Put a lock on your bedroom door (that requires a key) and put things up that you don't want them to mess with - cell phones, laptops, etc - and keep the key on you.

    Yes, this stuff is inconvenient, but sometimes you have to inconvenience yourself in order to be an effective parent.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 10:36 AM on Jul. 8, 2013

  • I'd suggest a 2-prong approach. Long-range goal would be to address your relationship with them (so it is less adversarial, so they aren't hiding their activities from you, & so you're getting more cooperation without resorting to forcing it) and the short-term goal would be to address the immediate situation as it is. (Ideally, "addressing" it in a way that doesn't undermine your long-term goal of strengthening your parent-child relationship.)
    I don't think it's safe to assume that they are going to stay in bed or sleep just because you "put them to bed." So, for now, don't go to your room, shut the door & watch a movie. Bring it out into the living room so that you are a presence (since at this point you need to be!)
    It also makes sense to get up early in the morning (while also reinforcing that you want them to come & get you when they wake) to minimize their opportunities to be unsupervised. A motion sensor/alarm may help.
    girlwithC

    Answer by girlwithC at 10:45 AM on Jul. 8, 2013

  • I tried staying in the living room and they never go to sleep they stay awake and complain that we're awake. I do wait until they go to sleep but they wake up after like 2-3 hours and that's when I'm in my deep sleep.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:53 AM on Jul. 8, 2013

  • Why are they having issues with sleeping? Do they take long naps during the days?
    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 10:57 AM on Jul. 8, 2013

  • They don't take naps anymore I've tried but they never fall asleep
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:58 AM on Jul. 8, 2013

  • How about locks (like a hook & eye lock) on the outsideof their doors so they can't get out of their rooms? If gates & other safety measures aren't working, you may need to do this. It's not just messes I'd be worried about, but their safety. If they have access to your car keys, & have no respect from electrical things, that is a recipe for disaster. Next, call in Super Nanny, b/c they sound like little hellions that need to be totally retrained. My kids were a handful when they were little, but never to that extreme.  If you don't want to make that call, then instead of mommy, it's time for a drill sergeant. 

    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 12:35 PM on Jul. 8, 2013

  • Put a motion sensor in their rooms that will chime in your room to wake you up when they get up and start moving around. Then you get up, put them back to bed. Every time. They will eventually give up.
    JulieJacobKyle

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 12:37 PM on Jul. 8, 2013

  • Honestly, it sounds to me like you may need to get some professional intervention. Take parenting classes. Get those kids into behavioral therapy.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 2:10 PM on Jul. 8, 2013

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