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Our adult child, 19, was on a great road to success...wonderful grades, a top notch college living on campus, a wonderful relationship that showed promise for the future, a pretty good attitude despite some past struggles.
Fast forward 3 months, bf broke up with her (tough breakup) because she started smoking pot for something to do on campus, started skipping classes and lost financial aid/on academic probation, and now dropped out.
Living at home, doing not much of anything...internet, watching shows, texting nonstop (definitely looking for another relationship, with a girl this time, although she still would date a guy-we have said we don't care about that), sleeping during the day, staying up reaaly late, taking food up to her room, she won't eat what we eat due to self imposed dietary restrictions, being bitchy and argumentative with at least one family member almost daily, spending the little money left in her acct. that we saved for college expenses.
She finally got a job at the local grocery store. That's the only productive thing she's done in 6 months.
I'm trying to be positive, but it just gets us down that we've done our best to foster her success, but she is choosing a different path at the moment and it's way below what she's capable of. Trying hard not to say things we really think, like "get off your butt and exercise, read a book, clean the house, walk the dog, stop watching so much tv and texting nonstop, take a class, volunteer, do something to better yourself!"
If she didn't live with us, we wouldn't have to see it. We used to have so much in common, but nobody really wants to be around her much. We do try. She has become a pain to live with, to be honest.
We are good parents, but feel conflicted at this point in time. Yes, we love her, but have you ever just not liked your child? I feel like a bad parent for feeling this...
Asked by Anonymous at 9:29 AM on Jul. 11, 2013 in Adult Children (18+)
Answer by older at 9:43 AM on Jul. 11, 2013
Answer by missanc at 9:45 AM on Jul. 11, 2013
Answer by NannyB. at 10:00 AM on Jul. 11, 2013
Answer by girlwithC at 10:41 AM on Jul. 11, 2013
Answer by girlwithC at 10:50 AM on Jul. 11, 2013
Answer by mrsmom110 at 11:28 AM on Jul. 11, 2013
Answer by baconbits at 12:20 PM on Jul. 11, 2013
Answer by PartyGalAnne at 12:58 PM on Jul. 11, 2013
Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 1:23 PM on Jul. 11, 2013
Next question overall
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Not sure what to do to fix this- or let her sort it out on her own