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Should I allow the father to be there for my baby?

Well he has a 3 year old daughter and I told him I was pregnant and at first he was happy but then the next day he got really stressed out and didn't know what to do at all he thought it was my fault for wanting to have a happy family with him and he broke up with me saying he doesn't love me he needs time to think and he never told his family because he was scared I wanted him to tell them but he said no and he wanted me to take the pill but I said no because in the end I made a promice to never abort after I lost my daughter and he didn't say nothing but what got me mad was he never came to any doctors appointment he never told his family and he acts as if he doesn't care because he never asks me how is my pregnancy going until now and its been 2 months we never came contact and he says he wants to be there for our kid but I dont know if I should let him or not and he has never been there at all when I wanted him to be there

Answer Question
 
shellyp01

Asked by shellyp01 at 2:40 PM on Jul. 19, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 1 (2 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • If he is not abusive than he should be a part of his child's life.
    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 2:43 PM on Jul. 19, 2013

  • What virginiamama said. But also I would NOT give the child his last name, use yours.

    Take it one day at a time, no matter how crappy he has been to you he still has rights to his child.
    tntmom1027

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 2:47 PM on Jul. 19, 2013

  • I know and he did lay a hand on me one day on our argument but he has a huge temper that he can't control and he said it was my fault for getting pregnant and I want him to he there but I'm also scared that he will abandon my baby
    shellyp01

    Comment by shellyp01 (original poster) at 2:48 PM on Jul. 19, 2013

  • He sounds like he is confused just let him be there for y'all's baby and once the baby is here and the minute he shows any signs of NOT being in the baby's life then you will know what to do. Forget the past just go from here on out.
    The baby will want to know their daddy so give the baby that much just go with it...congrats! and good luck!
    Butterfly1108

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 2:49 PM on Jul. 19, 2013

  • Tell him this. Bring me to court for visitation if you want to be in the child's life.  If he does that. Then get him for CS.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 2:49 PM on Jul. 19, 2013

  • my fault for wanting to have a happy family with him
    So this was an unplanned pregnancy?
    Were neither of you using protection?

    or did you get pregnant on purpose without discussing it with him?

    he never told his family because he was scared
    scared of what? how old is he? how old are you?

    he wants to be there for our kid
    he doesn't love me
    so what if he doesn't love you. he wants to be a father. he just doesn't want you. that's not a good enough reason to prevent someone from parenting



    feralxat

    Answer by feralxat at 2:49 PM on Jul. 19, 2013

  • That's true and he left me because he found out I was pregnant and your right and he is a grown man who acts like a child
    shellyp01

    Comment by shellyp01 (original poster) at 2:52 PM on Jul. 19, 2013

  • he left me because he found out I was pregnant

    How serious was the relationship?
    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 2:53 PM on Jul. 19, 2013

  • It was serious I don't even know why he acted like that one day he was excited then all of a sudden he begins to change and blames me for the pregnancy calls me names and then he said he needed time to think and it hurted me because after all this time I was thinking about how to raise our child and at the last minute when I moved somewhere else he says he wants to be there
    shellyp01

    Comment by shellyp01 (original poster) at 2:56 PM on Jul. 19, 2013

  • Punctuation.
    Grammar.
    Until then, I can't read this.
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 3:27 PM on Jul. 19, 2013

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