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How do YOU deal with the narcissist in your life?

My DH's family pretends to be very close. (It is always totally awkward during holidays/get-togethers)

FIL is epitome of narcissistic. Textbook diagnosis. Highly OCD, and manic.

How do you/have you dealt with someone like this?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:47 AM on Jul. 22, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (15)
  • One of my co-workers is narcissistic and it used to drive me nuts, if I'm having a bad day, I want to wring her neck!
    I have learned to ignore her and let her to continue to live in her perfect world!
    I tend to say, let's just agree to disagree.

    It's very frustrating and has to very hard to be so perfect!

    Answer by PMSMom10 at 12:53 AM on Jul. 22, 2013

  • I try to interact with the narcissists in my life, particularly in my family, as little as I possibly can. I wish them no ill will, the same as any other human beings, but I want nothing to do with them.

    Answer by Ballad at 12:56 AM on Jul. 22, 2013

  • Lucky I only work with them (there are quite a few though) but I just tune them out. I feel sorry for people that live in their own bubble.

    Answer by maecntpntz219 at 1:02 AM on Jul. 22, 2013

  • I cut them out of my life. I have no time or energy to deal with that kind of thing.

    Answer by anime_mom619 at 1:02 AM on Jul. 22, 2013

  • Boy, is he aggressive, though!!

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:07 AM on Jul. 22, 2013

  • Narcissists love to talk about themselves and enjoy any opportunity to prove their superiority. If you can't avoid being around him, I would at least try to go with the flow& keep an inside joke to make it more tolerable. For example, throw out "bait" topics or requests and let him go crazy on it and falsely agree with him. I think they secretly like to argue just because. Deflect the conversation to being about him so that he knows less about your life & keeps his own opinions to himself. Maybe even pay him an unexpected compliment. Sometimes, it softens them up. In psychology terms, the more alike you seem to them, the less they'll try to control you. Subtle forms of mimicking their gestures and conversation style will diminish you as a threat to their control obsession. If you're like them but they see themselves as superior, attacking you also attacks them so they will avoid doing so. You know where you truly stand though

    Answer by hellokittykat at 1:46 AM on Jul. 22, 2013

  • I don't. I have only seen my sister for a couple of weeks when my dad has been around 16 years since we have really spoken. We do not talk on the phone.... hell I don't even have her number. If she comes to town, I might see her for an hour, but that has only been a handful of times in the 16 years. I wish her well.. as long as she is far, far away from me. When she is near I want to strangle her.

    I really try to stay away from energy sappers, they suck all of the happiness out of any situation.

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 1:49 AM on Jul. 22, 2013

  • I broke up with them.

    Seriously, I've known three in my lifetime, that I can recall. I married one, and dated the other two. I dumped all three of them, although I did remain friends with one of them, because even though he is a narcissist, he does seem able to control it a bit, and also seems to acknowledge that he knows he is one.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 7:30 AM on Jul. 22, 2013

  • Well, I don't really speak to my grandma. I call her once a week, she knows if she starts her shit I will hang up on her and I usually do it normally takes her less then five minutes to start.

    Answer by funlovinlady at 7:36 AM on Jul. 22, 2013

  • Avoid, Avoid, Avoid!

    Answer by louise2 at 8:26 AM on Jul. 22, 2013

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