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2 Bumps

My 20 yr old daughter acts pissed off all the time.

has no respect, have my brother and wife and 2 kids staying for week . My daughter has been rude, disrespectful, bloody minded and difficult. It's become so embarrassing . Won't take a telling. Just yells and acts totally pissed off. It's like he hates us all. She is bad enough with out visitors, but this week as been a living nightmare.
It has come to a head this week, since we have visitors. I can't believe how rude she as been. My brother and his family have been nothing but loving, kind and patient with her, but now even they are starting to pull back. If my husband or ESP my self asks her a question, she either barks the answer or snaps. She is home for the summer from University . She has a summer job, which she wanted and my husband managed to arrange for her. We've tried sitting and calmly discussing with her, our feelings and worrying her, this as turned into world war 3. With her yelling and and being disrespectfu

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nic262

Asked by nic262 at 8:15 PM on Jul. 23, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 2 (8 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Wow. I thought teens were supposed to grow out of this? Hugs mama. Sorry she's being such a turd.
    JackieGirl007

    Answer by JackieGirl007 at 8:23 PM on Jul. 23, 2013

  • Since you have tried talking to her and it hasn't helped, it's time for some tough love. Tell her she has 30 days (or less if it's really bad) to shape up or she is out. Give her an exact date that you MUST see improvement by. Give her a list of rules and things that she should be helping out with. I'm glad she is working and glad she is going to school. I've always said that as long as you live under my roof, you will obey my rules. Respect is a HUGE rule for me.

    Good luck!
    tempsingl3mom

    Answer by tempsingl3mom at 8:25 PM on Jul. 23, 2013

  • What happened?
    virginiamama71

    Answer by virginiamama71 at 8:32 PM on Jul. 23, 2013

  • God only knows what's going on in her mind!! Love her to bits, but don't like her just now.
    It's not boyfriend troubles, it's not girls chummy problems, she is lovely to friends, to work mates, even the old lady in the local shop, but she seems to be on a mission to wind us up the wrong tree. Honestly, I've bitten my tongue more times this last few weeks, thinking it's just a phase, or just to keep the peace. But we are at the end of our tether. She says nothing wrong, and says we ask stupid questions.
    Her temper just now is like torch paper.
    She doesn't interact with family, but prefers to shut herself in her bedroom on her own.
    Sometimes even chooses to ignore us , until she actually wants something , for example the car keys,
    She had a few strops as a teenager but nothing like this. Infact she was an ideal teenager.
    I'm at my wits end with her.
    Thought it might be drugs, but she is totally against drugs, smoking, etc....
    nic262

    Comment by nic262 (original poster) at 8:47 PM on Jul. 23, 2013

  • Sounds like she does not really want to be at home.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 8:53 PM on Jul. 23, 2013

  • She needs to be getting her own job and paying her own way. She is being the entitled child you raised
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 9:04 PM on Jul. 23, 2013

  • Sounds like she does not really want to be at home.

    I agree wit Louise. It can be really difficult for a child who has been away at school and found her freedom to fit back into the family and home. It's like putting on a shoe that's gotten to be a half a size too small. I had an awful time of it--granted, my mom was abusive so it doesn't compare to this situation--but it might be a good idea to sit down with your daughter and make other arrangements for her next vacation. Maybe staying with relatives, or continuing to live on campus. Don't kick her out exactly, but just tell her the present situation isn't working for anyone because of her moods. She may be relieved and relate to you better if she isn't trying to live under your roof. I got a couple of part-time jobs and stayed with an aunt the next summer I would have been home, then took an apartment with three girlfriends from school till I got married.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 9:52 PM on Jul. 23, 2013

  • Great suggestions above, but in our house she would not be getting the car keys for anything while acting like this. You might want to sit down and say it will not be tolerated any longer. You need to have a family meeting and be united to bring an end to this. Tell her how much you love her, but disrespect and anger will not be tolerated.
    silverthreads

    Answer by silverthreads at 8:53 AM on Jul. 24, 2013

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