Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Hi i have a 12 year old daoughter who always wants to spend time with her friends and is always in her room on BBM. Not motivatef to do anything else

I feel like I am losing my daughter. I feel that I need to take away her Blaclberry but that causes a lot of chaos , shouting and black mail from her. please advise

 
sally266

Asked by sally266 at 3:25 PM on Jul. 26, 2013 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 1 (3 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • I'm not sure what a 12-year-old could blackmail her mother with, but I think you need to start by clarifying to yourself what you expect your daughter to be doing that she isn't doing. Then relay those expectations to her, along with consequences--losing her phone comes to mind--if she doesn't follow the rules. If she screams and yells when you take the phone, you keep it longer. Unless there is something more serious going on, that's where I'd start, but be clear what you expect and why it's different from the reality that's going on right now.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 3:56 PM on Jul. 26, 2013

  • Blackmail from your 12 year old?
    What have you done wrong, mama, that she has such incriminating evidence against you??
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 3:44 PM on Jul. 26, 2013

  • I want to know what job the 12 yo has. Seeings she has a blackberry,
    funlovinlady

    Answer by funlovinlady at 3:47 PM on Jul. 26, 2013

  • Goodness- why in the world would a 12 yo want to hang out with kids her own age?
    What do you expect from her?
    Motivated to do what? She's 12.
    feralxat

    Answer by feralxat at 3:34 PM on Jul. 26, 2013

  • She's 12, step up and be the parent..
    midnightmoma

    Answer by midnightmoma at 3:28 PM on Jul. 26, 2013

  • My 12 yo did the same with no phone. It's kind of normal actually
    funlovinlady

    Answer by funlovinlady at 3:39 PM on Jul. 26, 2013

  • Thanks for your quick response. A BBM is a blackberry messenger.
    sally266

    Comment by sally266 (original poster) at 3:34 PM on Jul. 26, 2013

  • get her off the BBM and get her more actual time with friends!!! That's what she is SUPPOSED to be doing at 12!!
    Crafty26

    Answer by Crafty26 at 4:07 PM on Jul. 26, 2013

  • What have you done so far to motivate her?
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 4:24 PM on Jul. 26, 2013

  • Restrict electronic use and require a certain amount of family tim. However this is the beginning theteen yeas ad yu will find that their fried are very important. athey should be.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 5:15 PM on Jul. 26, 2013