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At a loss here

Okay my four yr old daughter has suddenly started going #2 in her room at night instead of coming out. I have tried everything but she still continues to do it...she'll try hiding her soiled underwear in places like toys, under her bed etc. She will be starting school soon and I don't want this to be something that disrupts her from havint a fun experience! She doesnt do it during the day but i dont want it to start because of being at a new place with people she may be nervous of! No bashing, I am reaching out. Thanks.


Asked by Anonymous at 11:15 PM on Jul. 30, 2013 in Preschoolers (3-4)

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • No, physical. It really takes so little to throw little ones off their game. She could have had a bout of constipation that scared her, she could have some other bowel issues that need to be looked at. Clearly, something is frightening her or, at the least, trapping her in this cycle.

    Another thought....if they laugh at her, it could be seen by her as shaming/embarrassing. No one wants poopy pants. I suspect she's no different but she doesn't have the coping skills to deal with the issue on her own.

    Answer by Mrs_Prissy at 11:45 PM on Jul. 30, 2013

  • Do you have her sit on the toilet before bed? Have you tried diapers? (Act like a baby, be treated like a baby)

    What's changed in your home recently?

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 11:16 PM on Jul. 30, 2013

  • Could she be jealous of the baby? Was the breakup of your marriage recent? Sometimes stress can make a child regress.

    Answer by Ballad at 11:22 PM on Jul. 30, 2013

  • I had a baby 7 months ago, but it's been the passed month or so. Sometimes I wonder if it's because my exes parents let her have accidents without any kind of punishment...just my thinking. We always have her potty after story time. I feel like she is aftraid to come out but I don't understand why because we are always welcoming to potty time/needs

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:18 PM on Jul. 30, 2013

  • Her father and I haven't been together for a while and I remarried but that isn't too recent. And that's possible but I love her kust as much and I try to make that very known. Any suggestions are welcome too! Parenthood is always learning lol

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:26 PM on Jul. 30, 2013

  • There should never be punishment for accidents. This causes a sort of backlash where she has an accident, she's fearful of being punished so she hides her soiled panties. This needs to be dealt with calmly, without punishment but with caring and compassion. I'd have her checked out by your pediatrician to rule out any health issues but then I think you need to look into less stressful ways of dealing with the issue

    Answer by Mrs_Prissy at 11:37 PM on Jul. 30, 2013

  • Mrs_prissy by punishment I didn't mean actually yellimg or making her ashamed...I mean they laugh like it's funmy and cute and okay....and it is not...that is what I meant. And eventually it has become so frequent that I don't know what to do with it. As far as health issues, do you mean psychiatric?

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:40 PM on Jul. 30, 2013

  • I'm unsure as to why she would develope an issue at this age and only at nightbut I guess anythings possible

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:43 PM on Jul. 30, 2013

  • That it's only at night leads me further toward a physical cause. She's asleep and can't control her bowels consciously. I'd take her to the pediatrician

    Answer by Mrs_Prissy at 11:46 PM on Jul. 30, 2013

  • Well she wakes up and goes potty in things, like she eent potty in a toy and hid it and then put her undies in the clean hamper with her pther undies. I honestly think she thinks she is gonna get jn trouble for being up and out of her room. Maybe someone has an activity I can try to show her thT it is okay to come out at night. She is aware when she is doing it. night time bed wets arent as frequent and they don't concern me bc I discard them as just that, occasional accidents. Theyre far and few btwn.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:50 PM on Jul. 30, 2013