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I am being mean today...19 weeks pregnant

So my back is absolutely killing me and I had a stressful day at work... so when i got home I made dinner and asked my two daughters as nicely as possible to please play in their room and watch a movie in order to give me time to unwind. (they are 4 and 6) I just want to be left alone and I feel like I am being a horrible mother because of it-but they are happily playing together and if they were out here I almost certainly would be acting short with them because I can't relax.
What do you ladies think? Ever feel like that? what did you do?


Asked by LuckyClown at 5:15 PM on Feb. 18, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 1 (3 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • I don't think you're being mean. You're being human. Your dd's are playing happily, they probably aren't thinking anything of it. Now, if every day, every time, they tried to talk to you, play with you, etc, you were shoving them away, that would be a different thing.

    Instead, what you described was a normal person having a bad day, needing a few minutes to themselves, and your kids are ok with it. IF they do ask about it - which they probably won't, since they're happily playing - then just say "You know how sometimes you're in a bad mood and just want a few minutes by yourself? Well, Mommy had a bad day, and I'm in a grumpy mood, and I don't want to be grumpy at you, because it's not your fault I had a bad day, so I just needed a few minutes by myself so I could stop being mad."

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 6:59 PM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • Mommies need time off too. One of my daughters was very wise and always had her kids take time in the afternoon to be in their rooms napping or playing. This was her quiet time.

    If you are still feeling bad, know that the time to yourself will help in dealing with the kids. Take 15 minutes for each child each day to read to them or just have "mommy" time, if you can. And remember, we are all human--not super-human.

    Answer by chocolateroses at 5:19 PM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • You're 19 weeks pregnant? Sounds like hormones to me. Of course you're not being mean, and you know it. Your body doesn't. It's ok not to be Wonder Woman. We've all been there. (Hope you got a chuckle from that.)

    Answer by BetsyAD at 5:47 PM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • You're not being mean! Trust me, I had a day like that yesterday. It was a day from hell and when I came home, I just wanted some "me" time. My kids are young, though (2y and 6mo), so I didn't get much of it, but I was able to distract my oldest with a movie and my youngest was content to sit (her newest skill) and play with her animal toy thingy. It gave me a chance to just veg on the couch and not do much. Keep in mind that a refreshed and recharged mommy is a better mommy!

    Answer by beadingmom17 at 6:31 PM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • My daughter is only 7 months old and i need some time ALOT. Im a stay at home mom and im 3 months pregnant. If i dont get some time to myself every week or so then i go bezerk >__>

    See if Daddy or the Grand[arents will watch the girls for an hour or so and go somewhere. I had my hubby drop me off at the bookstore for an hour and when he picked me up i fealt sooo much better! It doesnt have to be all day, just let yourself relax and recharge as beadingmom17 said.

    Good luck with everything! It sounds like youre an excellent mommy. A "mean" mother wouldnt worry if she's being mean ;)

    Answer by SpiritedTigress at 6:53 PM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • it's good that you rec. what you have to do to be able to be 100% for them just take your time but remember to give them theirs (I'm sure you do though).

    Answer by Happ-eToBme at 7:34 PM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • Kids need attention and affection even when it's not "conveneint" for the parent, that's what you sign up for when you decide to have children. If that is such a drain to you I have to wonder why you would have wanted to get pregnant again.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:07 PM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • story of my life...

    Answer by But_Mommie at 8:31 PM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • Oh shut the hell up Anon 7:07. There is nothing wrong with the kids watching a movie for a few minutes while mom chills out. Or would you rather she lose it and smack one of her kids cuz she didn't get "me" time??

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:55 PM on Feb. 18, 2009

  • when you need space it isokay to ask for it............better that then pushing yourself and snapping at them.

    Answer by AmaliaD at 9:14 PM on Feb. 18, 2009