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2 Bumps

I have no clue what to do with this enabled SS

He is 27. Never worked. Plays games all night. He just woke up now and it's 5 pm.

Our DD left to spend a few days with my family. She got a smart tv flat screen for her birthday from my mother. While we were taking her to meet my family my SS took her tv off the wall and took it to his room. DH discovered it missing from her room this morning and ran into SS's room to find it on the fucking floor. He was asleep but apparently got it to play games yesterday.

Here is the convo.

Ss: is there a valid reason you took the tv out of my room?
DH: because
SS: you stay outta my room. Stop taking things.
DH: I wanted to listen to music

I went off on DH. What the hell. Tell him to keep his ass out of her room and stop taking HER things! This is crap.

Everyone caters to this rude Grown Man. Grandma goes and gets him dinner when he doesn't want what I cook. We buy his dog food. Gives him gas. dH even gives him money that he thinks is going towards him getting a drivers license, job, etc...but it's to buy weed.

Its not my place to confront SS and even if I tried it would end very badly.

We've been married 10 years. I love DH. He is a great daddy to our DD....but this crap of his continued enabling of his son is causing a problem.

Do you think I over reacted by going off on DH? He should have told him to leave her stuff alone instead of pussy footing around the brat. Right or wrong?


Asked by Anonymous at 6:16 PM on Aug. 3, 2013 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (12)

  • it's your house.

    you shouldn't have to keep your personal items under lock and key
    if DH thinks you should then perhaps he should pay to have locks installed

    create a routine that suits you.
    if DH complains, then perhaps he could be made to understand that at your age, in your home you are going to do as you please
    if DH wants SS to be able to sleep in, then suggest to DH that he could purchase earplugs for SS

    you could also explain to DH, since he sees no problem with SS touching your intimate items that you will need to discard those items and DH should purchase you new items (i now someone who can help you replenish your goody drawer)

    just keep putting it on DH

    Answer by feralxat at 7:12 PM on Aug. 3, 2013

  • he needs to move out
    You and DH need to sit down and decide how many days you are going to give him before he is evicted

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 6:20 PM on Aug. 3, 2013

  • Maybe he needs an evaluation by a psychologist? Sounds very weird to me, I think he might has some issues, so I would have him see someone before I went ballistic.

    Answer by 2kids2dogs2cats at 6:19 PM on Aug. 3, 2013

  • Uh no. Your husband needs to kick that lazy ass 27 year old out of the house or things will never change. Who volunteers to live with their parents at that age unless it's necessary financially?

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 6:22 PM on Aug. 3, 2013

  • You kick his adult ass out the door and let him mooch off his mother. How the convo should have gone....

    SS: is there a valid reason you took the tv out of my room? DH: Yes, it does not belong to you. And since your room is in my house, I can go in there whenever I damn well please. You don't own any of this I paid for it. If you don't like it you can move out.

    I suggest SS enlist in the military.

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 7:41 PM on Aug. 3, 2013

  • You were not wrong to go off on your DH. SS needs to leave immediately or get a job and a license.

    Answer by tempsingl3mom at 6:36 PM on Aug. 3, 2013

  • You were right, but you might be spinning your wheels because it sounds like you've gone off plenty of times before with no results. You may have to draw a line in the sand with your husband, since the way he is enabling is son is obviously damaging your marriage.

    Answer by Ballad at 7:10 PM on Aug. 3, 2013

  • Something is wrong with him, I don't know what it is, but I would think if he is ever to have a life of his own, his father should try to get him some help of some sort.

    Answer by 2kids2dogs2cats at 7:10 PM on Aug. 3, 2013

  • Something has to change. I'm so at my witts end.

    I can't do laundry until SS gets up ( between 3 and 7 pm) because it disturbs him. He got my cc out of my purse last week and bought 60 bucks worth of online games. DH thankfully caught it before our checking account was over drawn and told him to stop the recurring charges. However, DH got on to ME for not knowing better....I should hid my purse at all times.

    He sneaks into my private drawer in bedroom to use my iPad or cell when we are gone or asleep! I mean really, ladies....he's picking up my damn dildo to get to it. Gross!

    No privacy, walking on egg bells. I love and adore DH. But I want his on fucking son gone from this house. My God..I feel like the evil step mother.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 6:52 PM on Aug. 3, 2013

  • Sorry for the typos. I'm so angry I doubt I'm making sense. I'm going for a walk. I need to chill out.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:03 PM on Aug. 3, 2013

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