Mainly talking, communication. I provide a physical limit if necessary (if a young child is very upset & very impulsive, and needs to be protected from hurting property or persons.) I intercede if kids are being harsh with each other, and have them tell ME their angry, blaming feelings (not their sib.) I also try to facilitate their communication during conflicts. Essentially, modeling what I want to see/hear from them when they are upset, via helping them through.
Most off-track behavior is a matter of kids feeling disconnected & alienated, so most discipline is about addressing the underlying need that the problem behavior is highlighting ("acting out.") I think this is the most effective form of discipline because it sees problem behaviors as signals that the child needs help, and responds in a way that actually addresses that! So the behaviors resolve without punishment, simply because the issue driving them is resolved.
at 9:48 PM on Aug. 8, 2013