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Need help with my angry 8yr old daughter

the last few months my daughter has just been extra angry and she takes it out on her siblings and I don't know what else to do ive grounded her im in the process of getting her a therapist but I just don't get it shes a bully. she doesn't act this way in school either there are 6 of them 3 of which are here all the time 1 we don't see anymore and im sure that has a lot to do with it another 1 I have 50/50 with his dad and then she sees her dad every other weekend and were going to look into every weekend so she sees him more in the school year just cause of the distance we live apart and he cant get her to school. im just at loss of whats going on with her I try my hardest to spend quality time with her but with all the kids and working 40hrs its hard and shes the only one we have issuses like this with

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Asked by Anonymous at 3:13 PM on Aug. 12, 2013 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (11)
  • Why don't you see one anymore? What happened? Did her behavioral issues start around that time?

    Answer by Mrs_Prissy at 3:16 PM on Aug. 12, 2013

  • is she the oldest one?

    what happened with the one you don't see? were they close?

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 3:20 PM on Aug. 12, 2013

  • its my husbands daughter and her mother is a bitch and doesn't want her around us anymore and they were close cause the rest are boys but our youngest shes 2. I want to say this started around this time

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:23 PM on Aug. 12, 2013

  • *HUGS* mama.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:23 PM on Aug. 12, 2013

  • Anger is usually a cover-up for some other emotion. She very well may be afraid she will be the next one to be sent away, never to be seen again. Children do not think like adults, and they cannot process this kind of disruption in the family. Even though you may have explained it to the best of your ability, I'm guessing she is a very scared little girl right now.

    Answer by NannyB. at 3:28 PM on Aug. 12, 2013

  • my step daughter didn't get sent away her mother is just a control freak and my husband not wanting to drag anything in court we don't see her and shes always lived with me and always will and her dad and I have a great relationship were shes more then welcome to go over to see him stay the night or whatever she wants

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:31 PM on Aug. 12, 2013

  • I suspect NannyB is dead on target. Dad not wanting to fight in court is essentially telling the kids they're not worth fighting for. Your daughter may well be afraid that you may think SHE'S not fighting for either.

    Or there may be something else going on. You need to get to the counselor as fast as you can. As in yesterday is not too soon.

    Answer by gdiamante at 3:39 PM on Aug. 12, 2013

  • You're doing the best you can, I'm sure, but it sounds like there's been chaos in your family, and there are a lot of comings and goings of different kids at different times. Your little girl might just be having trouble processing the situation. Hopefully a counselor can help her.

    Answer by Ballad at 4:09 PM on Aug. 12, 2013

  • The message your husband is sending is that kids are not worth fighting for, perhaps she thinks the same could happen to her?

    Answer by 2kids2dogs2cats at 4:10 PM on Aug. 12, 2013

  • I'm guessing her anger has something to do with the whole blended family deal. I grew up in one and am in one, so that's not a judgement just an observation based on experience. There were 5 of us and the only one that had any major issues was my sister, not that the others of us were any better than her, we just handled things differently. But don't think that because the others aren't acting the same way that they aren't affected, they are just handling it differently. I'm glad you're seeking out a therapist, and family counseling in addition to individual counseling for her might not be a bad idea. My guess is this is a family issue and it may take the whole family to fix it.

    Answer by missanc at 4:11 PM on Aug. 12, 2013

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