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So, I started at my new job about a month ago...

I had been a stay at home mom for 5 years. It has been good up until this point where I am getting insanely worried about the hecticness of what my life/my family's lives will be like starting next week when I start back at college and the kids start school!

My oldest DD is starting Kindergarten, youngest in Headstart. I will be volunteering there in the am for breakfast on M/W/F. I will be in school from 8 am to 8 pm on Tuesdays with 2 small lunch and dinner breaks. Thursday, I will be in school from 8 am to about 4 pm.

The girls can be at school from 7:30 to 7:55. AND my new job P/T at a gas station.

Homework, kids' homework, work, college, volunteer, .... I only get my job schedule a week ahead of time, and the first week of school, I don't get home until close to bedtime for the first 3 days! I am heartbroken. I want to be there to help with homework, make dinner, make sure they are bathed/clothes set out/read to/homework done well.... I am not handling this well. I think I have no choice but to talk to my boss about putting my on day shift while kids are in school or give 2 weeks if that's not possible (it's what I was supposed to be working anyways).

Sorry so long, I guess my question is what would you do? My first priority is my kids/family. Second is school so we can have a better life and I can follow my dreams/be happy/be a good role model. Next comes the job.

Answer Question

Asked by Kword at 11:14 PM on Aug. 15, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 27 (29,610 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • I would tell him you were supposed to be on day shift and during the school year that is the ONLY schedule that will work for you. If he can't accommodate that, then you will have to quit. DON"T quit school! You might cut down on volunteering if it gets to be too much. Good luck!

    Answer by kmath at 11:18 PM on Aug. 15, 2013

  • Can you cut out the volunteering and try to have your work hours scheduled then instead?

    Answer by NotPanicking at 11:19 PM on Aug. 15, 2013

  • I think that is the only good option, too kmath. I refuse to sacrafice that valuable time with my kids. I will not quit school, either. I've made it too far and have too good of a track record and too high expectations of myself! :) One degree down, one to go. Then I can start a good career about which I am totally excited!

    Thank you!

    Comment by Kword (original poster) at 11:20 PM on Aug. 15, 2013

  • Wow, that's busy! I hope you can get the day shift, since that's what you were hired to work.

    Answer by Ballad at 11:20 PM on Aug. 15, 2013

  • The volunteering is contingent upon work hours/school hours, so it's not a regular/expected thing. So, in short, yes if work will change me to day hours. If they won't... then I think I'll have to quit.

    Comment by Kword (original poster) at 11:22 PM on Aug. 15, 2013

  • Thanks, Ballad. Me, too!

    Comment by Kword (original poster) at 11:22 PM on Aug. 15, 2013

  • I kind of like both ideas of cutting your volunteer hours and asking your boss for the shift you were hired for. However, be prepared for him to not be receptive to that. Those types of jobs are pretty notorious for not having a lot of flexibility. I'd hate to see you have to give up the job but if you can do without the money, that may be best. School is of the utmost importance here.

    Volunteering simply may have to be cut to a few less days. You can always make up for that in other areas, if possible.

    Answer by Mrs_Prissy at 11:24 PM on Aug. 15, 2013

  • As to dinner- crockpot!
    It is a life saver in these situations.
    You can also put meat and veggies in the oven on a bed of ice. Set the timer to turn on about an hour before you get home. Hot meal. No need to add water because as the ice melts (kept the food chilled) there will be water in the pan...

    Answer by feralxat at 11:26 PM on Aug. 15, 2013

  • I think you all have helped me affirm the decision I knew deep down I had to go with. I will talk to my boss about changing my schedule. I'll give her two weeks for change and explain that my priorities require that I be there for my kids and give myself enough time to do my own homework/papers/projects/studying in the evenings. Day shift will be the only way I can keep this job.

    Comment by Kword (original poster) at 11:28 PM on Aug. 15, 2013

  • feral! Thank you! Next week is sneaking up on me quickly! This will help a lot. lol. :)

    Comment by Kword (original poster) at 11:29 PM on Aug. 15, 2013

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