Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Interrogated .. .. adult content

My DH always asks me questions about my exes. Or sexual questions, before we have sex.. He tells me that it turns him on but he's already watching "videos".. I get annoyed by the questions, and the videos...
.. But when the tables are turned and I ask the questions.. He never gives a good answer.. Just "I don't know" .. Well I hate it! ... Couple of days ago he asked his (or "our") friend if she wanted to go with to get the pizza.. I asked him what they talked about ( I don't get why she had to go with in the first place ) ... He said.of course.. .. You guessed it.. " I don't know".. .. . .. How DH can stop taking a nap when she comes.. But takes a nap when she doesn't come... Why can't DH spend time with our kids.. .?. ... Ugh...

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:48 AM on Aug. 18, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • maybe ask him if there is something going on between them too.. and ask her as well..

    Answer by vivis.mommyy213 at 2:52 AM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • Yeah, I'd be keeping an eye on the body language of these two. I'm not a jealous or suspicious person but I can pick up vibes. Does 'she' know anything about what you've written here? If she does, I think it's time to re-think this friendship. If she does know of your turmoil, she should NEVER be going anywhere alone with him. Actually, unless she's like family, even then it's iffy, she shouldn't be accepting his offer at all. You also need to have a serious talk with your SO & tell him you really don't feel like he cares about how you feel. Always wanting more to arouse him instead of you. He may be headed for real problems down the line. My ex got so obsessed with B.J's that I got to where I didn't like them at all. In fact, I didn't like him for being that way.. Porno's & B.J's became a huge part of his life. Now he's an ex.

    Answer by Xlandria at 4:17 AM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • I think it's pretty obvious.

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 8:34 AM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • The answer is right in front of your face.

    Answer by louise2 at 9:09 AM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • Refuse to answer his questions. Turn the tables back. Give him the "I don't know" treatment.

    But I think you'd better make your exit strategy and plan to implement it in the next few days.

    Answer by gdiamante at 10:01 AM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • Hell no! first of all don't invite her over for awhile if the situation does not feel right and don't let him pull the "your crazy" card or "It's all in your head..your sick" card. If you have an uneasy feeling about his relationship with her I would put a stop to it. or kick his butt to the curb if he has a problem with it!!!

    That's just a mutual respect couples should have in a relationship, if he wasn't comfortable with you being friends with a guy with a certain guy than you should respect that. The sex thing, he should always make sure your into it too...meaning whatever the situation pormos, dirty talk, toys, or just old fashioned making love, you both should be into it and having a good time. NO TIME FO SELFISH LOVERS!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:38 AM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • 'Why' indeed? Those questions would be best asked of him. Watch his reaction carefully. I mean does he look you in the eye when answering? Does he stammer or does he answer straight forward? How is his body language?

    Answer by QuinnMae at 12:20 PM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • Some people can't see what is right under their noses because in their heart of hearts, they don't really want to see it.

    Answer by Ballad at 8:03 PM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • I agree with every one above; but, if you want to still keep him in the picture, the next time he asks her if she wants to take a ride with him somewhere, you cut in, "Oh, well actually, I wanted to go with you." It tells both of them that this game is over. It says to your friend that she is crossing the line and he is your SO. It tells him, that you are his partner and expect to be treated as such. I don't allow porno in my home, not because I am a prude or anything, but I have two ex-husbands who became so addicted to porn, that they were committing sex offenses on young women and I have children in our home. He has a SO, what does he need all the aids for? If he's not willing to explore these things with you, coming up with ideas together, and only worried about his own pleasures, tell your friend she can have him.

    Answer by Sierrarose99 at 9:47 PM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • Stand your ground.

    Answer by morebee7 at 10:55 PM on Aug. 20, 2013

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.