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My husband says he

My little one is an angel when he's with me, but apparently a terror for my husband when I'm at work.
Does anyone have a reason as to why this could be? Or how to remedy it?
Thanks! He is a great father normally. And when we are together my son loves him. He is happy with daddy around. I just don't know how to help them to get along I've tried explaining what I do and tried helping but he takes that as a stab towards him and it's not. My son is just a mommas boy. And my husband is a stressed person anyways. He thinks when he's home he needs to do everything to help me out and he doesn't. I'd rather he laze with our son. And for those saying he needs to grow up, at least my husband is here for me. He is my partner in this and I am blessed that he is here. Please take your disrespectful comments elsewhere.

Answer Question
 
KelaineS3

Asked by KelaineS3 at 9:59 PM on Aug. 18, 2013 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 2 (5 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • If your husband is tense around your baby, the child will sense it and behave differently.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 10:02 PM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • If he was my DH, I would tell himhe needs to try harder to get along with his son. Be a man and suck it up.

    Why is he telling you this? Does he want to put him in day care?
    He has to remedy it.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 10:03 PM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • Dad isn't feeling confident in his ability to care for baby by himself. What you may not even notice much (crying, cranky, etc) may be very stressful for dad. Watch them interact and see where he is feeling the most anxious.
    Mrs_Prissy

    Answer by Mrs_Prissy at 10:03 PM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • Obviously he's doing something wrong then. How is the baby around him when you're all together?
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 10:04 PM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • Have him care for the baby by himself while your around to see what the difference is.
    RyansMom001

    Answer by RyansMom001 at 10:07 PM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • Or set up a camera while you leave to see the difference. He isn't comfortable with the baby is probably the main reason. Do not ignore this though...if he doesn't feel comfortable you both either need to try and remedy it(more time alone with baby but with you at arms reach, discussing particular problems he is having etc, or you need to make other arrangements.

    My husband was very good with our son, but there were times where he would call me at work exausted because our son was just crying all day. He got through it though, just needed to vent.
    tntmom1027

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 10:15 PM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • Coach and help him when you are together. Tell him your "secrets" about what the baby likes and does not like. Tell him what your day with the baby is like. Help him get over this rough patch.
    silverthreads

    Answer by silverthreads at 10:16 PM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • He doesn't need to "handle". He needs to parent.
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 10:21 PM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • I would strongly encourage you to get very specific in finding out what your husband is having a hard time dealing with, and then helping him figure out how to handle things better, or make other arrangements. I don't know your husband, so I'm not saying he's a bad guy at all but child abuse often starts because of an inability on the part of an adult to cope with difficult behaviors. Not because the adult is an evil person, but he gets overwhelmed and reaches the end of his rope. Even getting a visiting nurse to come in and teach your husband ways to interact with the baby might be helpful. Please don't just ignore the problem because it may not go away, and the results could be very bad.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 11:20 PM on Aug. 18, 2013

  • I am home with our grandbaby all day, alone. Things that are the norm for me would probably drive my husband to believe something is wrong or she isn't happy with him.

    In the evenings he sees her cranky side and wants to know whats wrong? I assure him nothing and its not him, that she like us has had a long day and is ready to feel relaxed. They rock and watch silly shows together and most nights she falls asleep in his arms. Sometimes men are not as in tune with children as the moms are.
    GrandmaO2008

    Answer by GrandmaO2008 at 7:08 AM on Aug. 19, 2013

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