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2 Bumps

After high school, did you wanna settle down?

After I graduated high school, I met this guy. I moved in with him but I feel like I haven't had the full experience yet in life. I haven't went to parties nor did anything people do my age. I just turned 19 and he's going on 23. I thought it would be fun living together, all I do is come home clean, cook, work and pay bills. When I first moved in, my mom said I was making a big mistake. I post pictures of him and the both of us, but he show no contribute that I am his girlfriend. my friends be wanting me to come to parties but I turn down because I live with him. I'm not even in college at all because I'm in the army. My child is adopted because I am unable to take care of him. me and my boyfriend only have fun together but at the same place in life doing anything.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:42 PM on Aug. 21, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (23)
  • No, I wanted to keep partying. And, I did. I got married at 27.
    3libras

    Answer by 3libras at 11:52 PM on Aug. 21, 2013

  • No I didn't I went off to college. I did have some mental health issues that got in the way for a while. Then I settled down. I had my son at 22 and while I wouldn't change anything that gave me him I would have preferred to wait longer to have a child.


    My advice, move out and find yourself and experience life instead of sitting there with him. Being with someone doesn't mean you cannot experience life as JJK illustrated but he doesn't seem to appreciate you or want to experience life and grow.
    tntmom1027

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 12:07 AM on Aug. 22, 2013

  • After high school I went to college and intended to have a career in the Air Force. It did not work out that way. I worked and enjoyed my life and met a man that I felt I was going to marry but it was a few years later before we dated or decided on marriage. I have had a lot of experiences while I was single and while I have been married. I suggest you turn your focus to where you are and enjoy the life you have now. Even if you became a single woman tomorrow you can not go back and have those experiences you MIGHT have had. JMO
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 12:15 AM on Aug. 22, 2013

  • I suggest that you get a job and go back to school and do something with your life.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 12:17 AM on Aug. 22, 2013

  • Heck no. Went to college, got my career rolling. My mother beat it into my brain that a woman must be able to care for herself and that a high school diploma wasn't nearly good enough.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 12:20 AM on Aug. 22, 2013

  • I was married by twenty, finished college, was divorced at thirty, went to college again, got into a long term relationship, had a child at thirty-five. Telling you all of that to say that if you find you've made a mistake, it's not too late to change course. You'll probably do it more than once in your life. If you feel unappreciated in your relationship and you want out, go. If you dream of an education or a career, go after what you want. If you want to enjoy a social life you don't have now, go out and look for it. If you want to live on your own, get a place. You don't have to settle just because you made one choice that didn't turn out well for you. There's always another train; climb aboard.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 12:34 AM on Aug. 22, 2013

  • Oh hell no. That's way too young, and like you said, you haven't had a chance to have many experiences. If you are meant to be together, then you will find your way back to each other after each of you have had some time (and fun) being independent. Do not let your younger years get wasted on something that's likely to change as people change. I was almost like you, even the ages are so alike, and I found it boring as well. He also changed, and after some time being together, the real him comes out. One thing's for sure. Everyone else I know met their soul mate in college. Go to college as soon as you can. Take advantage of the military community college and the GI bill (a $30,000 benefit you shouldn't waste). Invest in yourself first. Then, everything else will fall into place. Plus, college can be fun. Being purposefully single is so much fun. Explore your interests on your own time. Damn, I miss it!!!
    hellokittykat

    Answer by hellokittykat at 12:35 AM on Aug. 22, 2013

  • Yes and no. I wasn't interested in getting married and having kids but I was into having just one guy and not running around doing young people stuff. It was just me and him and we liked it that way! He still sleeps next to me every night :)
    maecntpntz219

    Answer by maecntpntz219 at 12:40 AM on Aug. 22, 2013

  • Oh yeah and college is so much easier when you are young and have the energy still to study and juggle many things. Plus, use the GI bill while it's still being offered. With this economy and the recent attempt to suspend military tuition assistance, who knows if it will still be around in a few years. The time is now. Successful people are opportunists who know when to play their cards.
    hellokittykat

    Answer by hellokittykat at 12:42 AM on Aug. 22, 2013

  • Hunh
    young, living with a man who is older, doesn't contribute, doesn't go out, not in college but is in the army, mom doesn't approve, avoiding friends

    oddly familiar story
    feralxat

    Answer by feralxat at 1:06 AM on Aug. 22, 2013

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