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Need to vent..any other dads act like this?

I have 2 kids by the same guy and been with him for around 5 years. Well he just up and decided to leave . So I called for help and well now he throws in my face about me getting all his money in child support (the guy still has $800 left and lives with his mom and pays nothing the only bills he has is $45 for cell and gas for his scooter) I don't see any of the child support because he left me in the place that we are renting and all the bills to go with it I have just enough to get rent and bills paid but that's it. He doesn't feel he needs to help outside of the child support. He hasn't asked about the kids he ignores all my texts calls and messages. He doesn't ask to see them. My electric bill is late but I asked him (knowing he had enough money) to cover it and I'd refund it when I got child support just so it wasn't late and he kinda mumbled something and the next day he went and bought a new ps3 game. I'm just so angry at him for leaving me in this position... I just needed to vent....but has anyone else had a guy do this too?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:13 PM on Aug. 23, 2013 in General Parenting

Answers (15)
  • He doesn't feel he needs to help outside of the child support.
    technically- he doesn't

    And yes- many do act this way.
    Have you looked into downsizing to a more affordable place in the event he stops paying CS?
    feralxat

    Answer by feralxat at 12:18 PM on Aug. 23, 2013

  • About half the women on this site & half of all the relationships in America have ended up like this (or at least something similar to this) You can't force him to pay more attention to the children he helped to create. Any time he complains about what he has to pay to help support HIS kids, just remind him of what he'd be paying if you still lived together. Kids are expensive. In the meantime, call your local United Way (211) and Jobs & Family Services to see what help you can get with utilities, back to school items, etc. Local churches may be helpful too. GL
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 12:21 PM on Aug. 23, 2013

  • The child support is garnished and he and I just resigned the lease and like 2 weeks later he left
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:23 PM on Aug. 23, 2013

  • I am confused so let me make sure
    You are not married but live with SO (No criticism just clarifying)
    You have two children together over a 5 year span.
    You are both on he rental agreement.
    He leaves and says he is through with everything.
    So you are getting CS because you filed with the court.
    Do I have this right?
    After he pays you CS he has $800.00 a month left?
    If this is the case how do you expect him to give you more?
    He will also have rent and electric etc.
    You could take him to court over the lease but I doubt that you will get a favorable resolution and you will end up paying at the minimum, the court fees.
    How much longer is your lease? I would suggest you move to something less expensive at the end of the lease.
    You may see if there is a grant that you can get so that you can get training in a job.
    As far as whether he sees them our not, it is his loss
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 12:27 PM on Aug. 23, 2013

  • Yeah, at least he's paying his child support. You can't force him to be a father, you can't expect him to pay outside the CS agreement. It's your responsibility to pay your utilities and such. It's not always fair and it's never easy, but it's on you now.
    Mrs_Prissy

    Answer by Mrs_Prissy at 12:28 PM on Aug. 23, 2013

  • Resigned the lease? You terminated early?
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 12:30 PM on Aug. 23, 2013

  • Yes not married but lived together
    Yes to the rest and I feel if he is on the lease he's obligated to help and the water bill which is paid when rent is paid is in is name....after he left here he moved in with his mom and he doesn't pay anything there he only pays $45 for cell and gas for scooter. The lease is another year
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:34 PM on Aug. 23, 2013

  • Is there an extra room that you could rent out until your lease is up?

    JeremysMom

    Answer by JeremysMom at 12:34 PM on Aug. 23, 2013

  • No we moved here a year ago to be close to his job and everything was fine and time to renew or move so we renewed the lease and then he leaves and now I have to be here another year
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:37 PM on Aug. 23, 2013

  • Nope it's 3 bed and I have a boy and girl..plus I asked the landlord and they won't allow that
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:38 PM on Aug. 23, 2013

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