I'm a regular but am using anon for privacy reasons.
I've been in an on again off again relationship with a man for about 14 years now. He has a tendency to set me aside when things are going well and then get in touch again when he feels like he's missing me or whenever he needs some sort of validation or friendship or something, who knows.
Anyway, this last time was really painful for me for some reason. We were talking every day and we got together for a fun week vacation and then all of a sudden he stopped contact again. I was just done. He would respond to messages but only about once a week and I could see the writing on the wall. I told him that it was obvious I wasn't a priority to him and that I was finally calling it a day.
It's been a month and he hasn't reached out to me. I've done well because I haven't contacted him either but the last couple of days have been hard. I want to send him a message but I know that isn't a good idea. Then I keep thinking we've been through some stuff in 14 years and maybe I should send him a message. Then I think that'd be stupid. See what I mean?
I'm not young either so he isn't like this is some teenager thing going on. We are older.
In the interest of fairness he was going through something really difficult with his family when he cut me off this time. I was working with him to work through it and then he and his brother started hanging out quite a lot and that is when he drifted away. I understand that he was have a hard time but I told him I was feeling very shut out. I told him this again a few weeks later. He still closed the door on me which is why I told him I was done.
I'm not sure if that was the right thing to do. I'm just confused. If you have advice for me, even if it isn't rainbows and sunshine, I will take it.
Asked by Anonymous at 7:54 PM on Aug. 28, 2013 in Relationships
Answer by feralxat at 8:05 PM on Aug. 28, 2013
Answer by silverthreads at 7:59 PM on Aug. 28, 2013
Answer by tnm786 at 8:00 PM on Aug. 28, 2013
Answer by feralxat at 8:16 PM on Aug. 28, 2013
Answer by Dardenella at 8:17 PM on Aug. 28, 2013