Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

If your child does not grow up to practice the same faith you've raised them in

is that your failure or the child's?

Answer Question
 
NotPanicking

Asked by NotPanicking at 2:52 PM on Sep. 5, 2013 in Religious Debate

Level 51 (421,172 Credits)
Answers (23)
  • I don't think that's a failure at all. I was raised jewish. My husband is protestant. We raise our kids pretty much without religion. Just Christmas. Santa only. We are happy.
    mompam

    Answer by mompam at 2:54 PM on Sep. 5, 2013

  • neither. Just want them to be happy in who they are as a person. no matter what the belief system.
    nnh_mama

    Answer by nnh_mama at 2:57 PM on Sep. 5, 2013

  • I THINK my Christian parents took it as a failure on their part. They still don't realize that I was never a Christian-ever in my life. Even as a child I knew my spiritual song sang a different tune.
    sahmamax2

    Answer by sahmamax2 at 2:57 PM on Sep. 5, 2013

  • I don't think my parents feel they failed, they're recovering Catholics, too! I tried to go back to church when my DD was born so I could raise her with religion, but I felt too hypocritical. I just don't believe in it. I will talk about religion with her and let her explore when she's older, but really DH and I don't feel comfortable with any organized religion. I think if she grows up to be religious it will be fine (provided it's not some cult!)
    tessiedawg

    Answer by tessiedawg at 3:09 PM on Sep. 5, 2013

  • In my opinion, neither. But, then again, I don't practice a religion. However, I would feel concerned & somewhat responsible if one of my children became involved in a cult.
    3libras

    Answer by 3libras at 3:10 PM on Sep. 5, 2013

  • I'm sure a lot of people would consider it a failure on my part that my son chooses not to practice a religion at all, though he hasn't entirely turned his back on the idea of God. He HAS turned it on organized religion.

    If it's a failure on my part, I accept that. I've failed in a lot of things. And will fail in a lot more. Not particularly worried about that.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 3:17 PM on Sep. 5, 2013

  • It's not a "failure" on anyone's part. I believe that we each have to figure out what we can/ do believe and what works/ makes the most sense to us.

    I think that letting kids know there are many different beliefs, and encouraging them to learn about them is the way to go...
    charlotsomtimes

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 3:19 PM on Sep. 5, 2013

  • my parents don't take it as a failure on their part but a failure on mine, my dad still thinks im just being a stubborn god-hater and ill eventually come to my senses. as for me, im not pushing any religious ideas on my children, godless or not. when they ask a question, i answer it to the best of my objective ability without my atheism bias. i dont care if they decide they want to become atheists, christians, muslims, etc... all that matters to me is that they do their own research and figure out what they believe is true for them on their own. i will have failed if my children grow up to believe things without first questioning them.
    tnm786

    Answer by tnm786 at 3:20 PM on Sep. 5, 2013

  • It's not a failure. My "job" according to the Bible is to raise my children in a Christian home, teaching them about God/Jesus and modeling a godly lifestyle. The rest I am to leave up to God.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 3:35 PM on Sep. 5, 2013

  • My child following whatever path he feels is best for him could never be a failure. I want to raise him to have the tools to make an informed "choice" (poor word, but you know what I mean) about which faith resonates most with him. As long as he is respectful, tolerant, and actually understands what he believes, what he doesn't, and why, I'll be happy. His path is his own, all I can do is give him the tools to navigate it.
    bandgeek521

    Answer by bandgeek521 at 4:09 PM on Sep. 5, 2013

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.