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Is this too early to be getting married?

i propose to my boyfriend yesterday. i even purchased the ring. we been together since november and i been staying with him since then. he said yes, but i feel he tells others different. on facebook, his family has not added me to see who i was. only one friend added me but it was to be nosey on my facebook page. i am the only one spreading it around that we are engaged to be married. he is facebook active all the time, but i thought a person who was happy spread the word on the social network where their family is to notify them of the engagement. his ex is still calling and texting his phone. he put a lock code on his phone. he refuse to let me text his ex girlfriend back or call her back. he refuse to let me do anything that has something to do with her. she know we are together, but he has not told her about the engagement at all. he even answer her calls when he repeatedly complain that she calling/texting too much. he said he was gonna file a restraining order against her. he said that over 90 times and have not made one step towards it. he dont want me to touch her and will not tell me where she stay at. she can call/text all day long, i will not know. he still will not be mad. people say if he yes and i purchased the ring he can pretty much do whatever because he did not buy it with his money

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:27 AM on Sep. 6, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (42)
  • I am very sorry to say that he does not seem interested, and if you marry, he is not going to change.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 7:30 AM on Sep. 6, 2013

  • idk....I didn't go all over facebook announcing my engagement either, neither did my dh. As far as the ex, I'd be pissed and wouldn't even think about getting married until he left her alone. IMO, you haven't been together long enough to even think about getting married, but that is just my opinion. GL
    josiesmommy00

    Answer by josiesmommy00 at 7:41 AM on Sep. 6, 2013

  • not sure why (with all the ex issues) you would want to marry him
    *unless you thought that being engaged and planning to actually marry would change things

    sorry, he sounds like he doesn't really care...if he did, he would be taking care of the issue with her. It sounds like he doesn't mind that she stil calls/ texts him

    as far as announcing it all over FB...eh I wouldn't put too much thought into that really
    charlotsomtimes

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 7:46 AM on Sep. 6, 2013

  • I did and he completely ignored the fact that I did it.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:47 AM on Sep. 6, 2013

  • So...you've been engaged, at most, 24 hours, and you're made that he hasn't put it all over Facebook? He's a guy! They don't usually do that, and besides, you asked him - I don't know many guys that would brag that their girlfriend is the one who proposed.

    As far as the ex - she still calls and texts because he responds. And he responds because he wants to. And he won't let you "touch her." Are you talking about you want to beat her up? If so, #1 I don't blame him for not wanting you to do that, and #2 WHY? She may be contacting him, but he's not doing anything to stop it. It's not all her fault - in fact, to be honest, it's not her fault at all. If no one tells you to stop doing what you're doing, you have no reason to think it's wrong unless it's illegal, which this is not.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 7:49 AM on Sep. 6, 2013

  • He's the type of person that will announce an engagement or etc to let others know because he have many family members on his page
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:50 AM on Sep. 6, 2013

  • His ex still loves him and I asked him last week and purchased the ring later. he won't let me contact her at all,
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:52 AM on Sep. 6, 2013

  • One more thing - you moved in with him as soon as you got together? That might be part of your problem, too - you moved too fast and when you move too fast, the things that would have been red flags and made you end things early on end up not being red flags until you've gotten serious and now you feel too invested to admit that you made a mistake. If you'd moved more slowly, you might have dumped him after a month because of the ex, but now you feel you can't because you've invested 10 months in him and so you've got to try to make this work, even if it means trying to force him to behave/think/talk the way you think he should.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 7:53 AM on Sep. 6, 2013

  • It's like when I tell people we are getting married he go behind my back say different so people really don't knowledge it
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:54 AM on Sep. 6, 2013

  • It's like when I tell people we are getting married he go behind my back say different so people really don't knowledge it


    ********


     


    Yeah- that is a real issue.  


    not to mention the ex


    honestly, find a guy who loves you for REAL and let this one go...I don't see this situation getting any better

    charlotsomtimes

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 7:58 AM on Sep. 6, 2013

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