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How should I handle this?

Hey, I have a long story but I'm going to try to keep it short. I just got off the phone with my husband. He wants to keep our one year old daughter with him for the day on Friday. I told him I have no problem with him seeing her Friday but that I didn't want her to go out with him alone. He got really upset stating that he was her father and that he should be able to get her anytime he wants. I told him if he would come visit her on a regular basis then maybe she could go out with him. He just doesn't get it.. He just got out of jail (for drug related issues) not too long ago for the third time in a year. He can't hold a job and he doesn't really have his own place to live. He's been staying at different friends house since we've separated. We also have a three month old son but does he ask about how he is at all...no. The problem is I don't trust him...I'm scared something might go wrong if he takes her. What do you think?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:20 AM on Feb. 19, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • I think you're right to be skeptical and scared. Your children are in your custody and it is your responsibility as their guardian as well as their mother to make sure they are as safe as possible at all times. If you have doubts, you can't in good conscience put your DD into a situation where you can't be absolutely positive that she is safe. Can you try explaining to him your side of things and ask him after three incarcerations for the SAME thing, has he earned your trust?

    NovemberLove

    Answer by NovemberLove at 1:28 AM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • I think this sounds exactly like my life 20 years ago...You are right. Don't second guess yourself...ever. Stay firm. Tell him to get a court order - and press for child support. The stories I could tell you about what happened in my life and to my daughter when I 2nd guessed myself and gave in - you don't want to know. You are right. Trust your instinct.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:25 AM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • I think you are right on the money with this one sister. Don't second guess yourself or let him manipulate you into taking her. Stick to your guns! I'm going through...or WILL be going through...the same exact thing.
    mamakat21

    Answer by mamakat21 at 1:28 AM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • Hey I going through the same thing wit my baby's father ! And u r right! Dont do it ,I was feeling the same way. But what he did He file child support on himself! Thinking tht he was goin to get her whenever! But I won tht!! And thing is now he dont do shit!!! Notthing!
    firsttime28mom

    Answer by firsttime28mom at 1:38 AM on Feb. 19, 2009

  • Hell NO!, I can barely let my son go with his absentee, child support paying, non-drinking, workaholic dad.......OMG I could never let him go with someone who has been in prison 3X's in 1 year for drugs! And trust me, even if he demands it he can't. The cops would just laugh at this if they got involved.
    Gigi1969

    Answer by Gigi1969 at 2:39 AM on Feb. 19, 2009

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