Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Child support question..

Hello ladies,, so here's my situation/question.. I am currently 28 weeks pregnant with my first, who will be my little man named Jonah :) His father and I broke up before I found out I was pregnant, due to his alcoholism and when I found out about his drug use.. Well I told him when I found out I was pregnant and he doesn't care to be involved and hasnt contacted me since (3 months now) and I have Decided to move back home to be closer to family before I give birth because I don't have any family where I'm at right now, so I'll be moving about 5 hrs away.. So my question is, does anyone know how getting child support will go? I mean he won't be there to sign the birth certificate, and I'll be in another state when I request child suppprt, so I'm wonderig how difficult all that will be.. Anyone else been in a similar situation who might know what the process will be like?

Answer Question

Asked by BeachBumBaby at 12:10 AM on Sep. 14, 2013 in Relationships

Level 1 (2 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • First off you will have to establish paternity. Then it goes from there. He will have the right to petition for custody (not that CS and custody are the same issue, they are dealt with seperately), some men do once they get the CS papers. Talk to an attorney in your new area and they will be able to give you better advice. Good luck.

    Answer by kmath at 12:14 AM on Sep. 14, 2013

  • Even if he does try to get custody, which I don't see happening since he already made it clear he doesn't want a baby, I don't think they will take a baby away from a good mother and give him to someone who could pass a drug test, or a breathalizer at any time of any day.. And how would I go about establishing paternity? Thank you :)

    Comment by BeachBumBaby (original poster) at 12:26 AM on Sep. 14, 2013

  • COULDN'T*** pass..

    Comment by BeachBumBaby (original poster) at 12:27 AM on Sep. 14, 2013

  • Not saying they would give him custody, they might give him visitation though. Though, I doubt he would fight for it from how you describe him. I am not sure exactly about establishing paternity. Legal counsel is the best way to find that out. A lot of family law practices will give a free consultation. You could also try googling it for your state.

    Answer by kmath at 12:29 AM on Sep. 14, 2013

  • Yeah I'll see about a consultation.. And yeah even though I know he doesn't care about the baby, I still worry because towards the end I found out this man has issues.. It really scares me to think about my child being alone with him.. So I'm pretty nervous about what could happen..

    Comment by BeachBumBaby (original poster) at 12:37 AM on Sep. 14, 2013

  • Lawyer up for this. Paternity is done through DNA testing. The attorney can walk you through all of it.

    DO NOT go through this without an attorney or you could find he decides he wants the baby and drags you through the mud.

    Answer by gdiamante at 12:38 AM on Sep. 14, 2013

  • I would file for child support and give them his information. He may contest that he is the father and a DNA test will have to be ordered by the court. (hint, tell them at the hospital when you give birth that you want a DNA test done and that way the baby does not have to be poked again for the test and you are ready to go forward). He will have no choice but to have a test done. and there you go.

    Answer by Dardenella at 12:59 AM on Sep. 14, 2013

  • Call your state child support office, and they can tell you step by step what you need to do. Also consult an attorney, because it would be best to get your ducks in a row before the baby's here, because once he/she is, you'll be too busy to worry about all of this. GL!

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 1:15 AM on Sep. 14, 2013

  • Doesn't matter if he's there or not.
    File for sole custody, prove paternity, and establish child support. You might not get a dime out of him now, or ever, but leave a paper trail!

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 1:36 AM on Sep. 14, 2013

  • Thanks everyone, I will talk to a child support office/attorney to know for sure what it is I.need to do.. But as far as to what PartyGalAnne said, , is that really possible? To never get a dime out of him even though it is half his child too?

    Comment by BeachBumBaby (original poster) at 6:10 AM on Sep. 14, 2013

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.