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2 Bumps

my husband and i had a "argument" and now he isn't speaking to me. What should I do and am I wrong?

So my husband was acting a little off (which could be stress). A few nights ago he came to bed wanting sex. I said no because I was at the end of my cycle and was still having painful cramps. He continued to push the subject saying "oh it never stopped you before". Which I responded with "you've been saying this for well over a year. Where you to this we don't talk for days and you don't care". Anyways he refused to accept no and pushed more. So I got upset undressed threw the remote called him an asshole and just laid there for him to do his thing. I refused to participate. The next day I was texting him with no response. Again that night he wanted some I said "you don't speak to me at all and you want some ass you're stupid. Here we are 4 days later and he's still not speaking to me. What should I do?

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MsDallas19

Asked by MsDallas19 at 1:04 PM on Sep. 16, 2013 in Relationships

Level 2 (4 Credits)
Answers (23)
  • WoW. There are deeper issues here than him not speaking to you. Forced sex is NOT the norm.
    ILovemyPaulie

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 1:11 PM on Sep. 16, 2013

  • Yikes...
    sounds like you two should learn how to communicate a little better - and he could take care of it himself if he wants it *that* badly (though I never say no to mine-unless I'm actually sick)
    charlotsomtimes

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 1:14 PM on Sep. 16, 2013

  • Normally I don't say no. For what ever reason this time around my cramps were so painful. Honestly if he wouldn't have been understanding I would have offered other options. When he wants something there's NO talking him out of it. In these moments when u feel like I don't have a choice I feel so disrespected and it makes me feel like I'm just some random girl and not his wife.
    MsDallas19

    Comment by MsDallas19 (original poster) at 1:20 PM on Sep. 16, 2013

  • How long are you married? Lots of issues in this marriage!
    DJDNY

    Answer by DJDNY at 1:28 PM on Sep. 16, 2013

  • You CAN Say NO whenever you want. You are not his servant or there for his pleasure.
    ILovemyPaulie

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 1:32 PM on Sep. 16, 2013

  • We've been together 13 years lil over 7 years of marriage. We've done marriage counseling which has helped a lot. We are doing well except when it comes to him wanting sex in this manor. Now let me say I'm all for some 50 shades of grey action, but when it's mutual.
    MsDallas19

    Comment by MsDallas19 (original poster) at 1:36 PM on Sep. 16, 2013

  • Saying no is all fine and dandy but if he wants it he's getting it. I don't want to make it seem like it's always like this cause it isn't. He has these moments like he's on his cycle and loses his respect and his mind.
    MsDallas19

    Comment by MsDallas19 (original poster) at 1:37 PM on Sep. 16, 2013

  • You guys have much bigger problems than him wanting sex and you not wanting it. That incident is a sign of other issues, and if you're going to stay, I think more counseling is the only thing that will make this better.

    I will say my ex-husband was like this, and it's a big part of why I divorced him. His lack of respect for women became very clear after that, and while I'm not going to go into detail, I will say you need to be very careful here.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 1:44 PM on Sep. 16, 2013

  • Two can do the silent treatment game. I'd be so pisse if my boyfriend wanted to even touch me after arguing and then not speaking to me, I'd probably be re-evaluating the relationship.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 1:57 PM on Sep. 16, 2013

  • Keep those legs closed!!
    Women need to feel loved, appreciated, respected and secure in their relationships in order to want to give sex.
    MEN, on the other hand try to show those things WITH sex.
    That's not how it works.
    He needs to communicate better, and make you feel those things with words and actions first, then sex gets BETTER for both partners.
    PartyGalAnne

    Answer by PartyGalAnne at 2:11 PM on Sep. 16, 2013

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