Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

If your best friend's boyfriend was doing drugs would you intervene and ask your friend if she was ok or needed any help?

They have 3 kids. I recently heard that she is borrowing money for food and bills. He doesn't want her to work. I asked if she was okay and if she needed any help and she turned around and told me a week later by text that I'm rubbing it in her face and that I don't care about her or her kids. She then told me I should worry about my own husband??? Should I have just minded my business? Since when is caring a crime?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:06 AM on Sep. 17, 2013 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • You tried . I would have too. I would reply that I care, call if she needs me, and then let it go. No anger or drama....keep it simple.
    silverthreads

    Answer by silverthreads at 11:10 AM on Sep. 17, 2013

  • Leave it alone. When she needs help she'll ask. I'd make it known that your there if she needs you and you do care and your didn't mean to upset her.
    skinnyslokita

    Answer by skinnyslokita at 11:18 AM on Sep. 17, 2013

  • She's probably embarrassed and feeling defensive. Caring isn't a crime. You offered, she knows it, let her come to you if she decides to.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 11:20 AM on Sep. 17, 2013

  • I asked if she was okay and if she needed any help
    Is that really all you said? Are you ok? Do you need any help?

    Because if she followed up with this response
    I'm rubbing it in her face and that I don't care about her or her kids.

    She sounds unstable.
    feralxat

    Answer by feralxat at 11:32 AM on Sep. 17, 2013

  • I'd ask but I wouldn't nag. One of my former best friends has put herself through some BS but she always knew and admitted what she was doing or did wrong, even when she didn't do anything to correct it. So I never had to say anything really, but she knew I'd be there to help as long as it wasn't enabling.
    maecntpntz219

    Answer by maecntpntz219 at 12:36 PM on Sep. 17, 2013

  • She does sound defensive... I would have done the same. You cannot help someone that will not accept it. She may need some help... like al-anon.
    amazinggrace83

    Answer by amazinggrace83 at 12:58 PM on Sep. 17, 2013

  • What kind of drugs? If you know for a fact that he is using hard drugs, and this is causing her children to be without food, you need to call social services to have them investigated, if all you offered was help, and that is the way she responded, she could be on them as well.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:08 PM on Sep. 17, 2013

  • Nope. My best friend can deal with her own situations. She knows if she needs me I am here.
    2autisticsmom

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 1:35 PM on Sep. 17, 2013

  • Percocet and cocaine. I thought the same exact thing that she is doing drugs too.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:59 PM on Sep. 17, 2013

  • its sad that your friend is acting like you are the one that doesn't care.. you ask if she was ok so you care.. I would of said I do care that's why I asked and said if you need help or need anyone to talk to please let me know Ill be there for you... however sometime when people have drugys in there lives its hard to help so they don't know what to do besides take it out on others..
    brenda2013

    Answer by brenda2013 at 2:05 PM on Sep. 17, 2013

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.