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Has anyone had personal experience with this?

My 16 yo dd won't wear a dress to the homecoming dance. She flat out refuses. She was invited to go by a boy and she told him no that she wasn't going. My dh and I suggested going with just her friends but she doesn't want to wear a dress and she said all the other girls are. A friend of mine with a bi-sexual dd said since my dd has always dressed like a boy (doesn't like dresses) she is most likely gay. I told her I have a cousin who said she didn't wear a dress in middle school or high school till she was a senior and I'm sure there are others who did this but weren't gay. Has anyone had personal experience with this?

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:36 AM on Sep. 27, 2013 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (17)
  • /sigh

    There's no correlation between not wearing dresses and being gay.

    Answer by Mrs_Prissy at 11:38 AM on Sep. 27, 2013

  • I didn't wear dresses either. I'm not gay. That's an ignorant thing to say. So, does she assume that just because a woman wears a dress that this implies that she is straight? LOL. I just personally hated the way I looked in all of the dresses I tried on when I was younger. It's still hard for me to find something I am comfortable with. Been happily married to a man for 13 years and have never had the desire to switch sides.


    Answer by QuinnMae at 11:39 AM on Sep. 27, 2013

  • Not wearing dresses means you are gay? That has to be one of the most ridiculous things I've ever heard. My brother's date for prom didn't like dresses. She said she felt like an elephant in ruffles. She wore a tux that matched his. She created a minor stir over her clothing choice when she arrived at the dance, but they were both comfortable, and she definitely wasn't gay.

    Answer by Ballad at 11:45 AM on Sep. 27, 2013

  • Straight



    Answer by feralxat at 11:46 AM on Sep. 27, 2013

  • I know several women who never wear dresses & are not gay. Was that your question?

    If your daughter knows that A) she doesn't want to wear a dress to the dance, and B) all her friends will be wearing dresses at the dance, and C) she's not comfortable dressing differently than all her friends so she chooses to skip the event, then that sounds like a case of knowing her personal limits & making a conscious choice based on them. She knows she doesn't want to conform AND isn't comfortable being different or "sticking out" in that way (based on how she dresses for the event.) I think if she wanted to attend MORE than she disliked either conforming or being different/individual, she'd either choose to go in a dress or in an outfit she liked, because the desire to go would trump the other stuff. Sounds instead like attending the dance is a lower priority for her.

    Answer by girlwithC at 11:48 AM on Sep. 27, 2013

  • Not wearing dresses doesn't mean she's gay. If it were my daughter I would question her about why she doesn't like dresses? Does she not like the way they look/feel/etc. If you can figure out exactly what she doesn't like about them, there's a possibility you could find a style of dress that actually fits within her guidelines.

    Answer by missanc at 11:56 AM on Sep. 27, 2013

  • When I was in grade 8 we had a grade dance, I to did not wear a dress in fact 4 of us decided as girls we would not conform to the expected idea of what girls should wear. We wore dress pants and sleeveless blazers. But you know Madonna was in so.....Just think if she is gay then she won't get pregnant sooo there's that!


    Answer by pinkparcel at 11:57 AM on Sep. 27, 2013

  • Any of these would work great.  I really like the one on the right, although I probably couldn't have done that even in HS because I'm short.


    Answer by QuinnMae at 12:01 PM on Sep. 27, 2013

  • I hate dresses. In fact, the only reason I wore a wedding dress (as opposed to the wedding jeans or shorts I wanted) was because my grandmother said she would only come if I wore a dress - and her being at my wedding was more important than my hatred of dresses. Trust me when I say there is no way I'm gay. There is no correlation between being straight and wearing dresses and being gay and not wearing them. It's a matter of comfort, style and personal choice. That's it. Nothing at all to do with sexual orientation.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 12:37 PM on Sep. 27, 2013

  • Well then I suppose I should be gay.

    I hate dresses hardly ever wore them since I was 5 yrs old. I still won't wear them...I was reluctant to wear one on my wedding day! lol I just don't like them.

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 12:41 PM on Sep. 27, 2013

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