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How much is an appropriate monetary gift for a wedding?

Most of the time, we give $100 for someone we are not closely related to.
My very good friend's daughter is getting married on Saturday, and this is the fanciest wedding I have ever been too.
Bride and Groom both have good jobs, my friend's husband retired last year, and even though he gets a good pension, I was wondering how they could afford, what I think will be around $100,000 wedding.
Bride and Groom are paying for the wedding themselves, now I find it silly to spend that much, but do you think they would expect more than $100? Just for grins I googled the place they are having it, and it is over $75 per plate, not including drinks.
I don't want to be chintzy, but have no idea what the going rate is.


Asked by 2kids2dogs2cats at 2:33 PM on Oct. 3, 2013 in Just for Fun

Level 29 (39,783 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • I hear ya! That will definitely add up! Then go with $100. It is their wish to spend a lot on a Wedding but you are not required to give a certain amount at all.


    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 2:59 PM on Oct. 3, 2013

  • It would depend on how close you are to them. $100 is more than plenty for anyone.

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 2:49 PM on Oct. 3, 2013

  • Wow! $100 for a wedding gift of someone who's not family? Normally if it's family they get $30-$40 and if not it's a gift card for $20. There's no way I could afford that much money for just one person's wedding no matter how ritzy that wedding is. I always figured a wedding was to celebrate the joining of 2 people and not to see how expensive of a party you could throw and hope the guests would help you not only cover the costs but make a profit.

    Answer by baconbits at 3:00 PM on Oct. 3, 2013

  • Do they not have a registry?

    Answer by QuinnMae at 2:41 PM on Oct. 3, 2013

  • I'd give a check for $200 since they are your good friends Daughter. I usually give around $200.

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 2:49 PM on Oct. 3, 2013

  • I'd stick with $100 since that is what you normally give and with 4 more after at some point, yeah $100 is more than enough. If they spent too much that is on them.

    Answer by kmath at 3:10 PM on Oct. 3, 2013

  • No registry that I can find, checked Macy's, Pottery Barn, Crate and Barrell, and Target,
    That is about all we have, I didn't check Babies R Us, LOL!

    Comment by 2kids2dogs2cats (original poster) at 2:43 PM on Oct. 3, 2013

  • Plus when you buy something off the registry, it isn't as cut and dried as $100 or $150 would be, most of the time it is either big ticket items, or small stuff.
    I figure they already live together, so money is the best option.

    Comment by 2kids2dogs2cats (original poster) at 2:45 PM on Oct. 3, 2013

  • Oh I love my Paulie, my husband won't stand for that, he already has been bitching about having to wear a black suit and tie! Of course I made him try his suit on last night, and the pants were too tight, so now he has to go shopping with me as well, this is good punishment for him!
    She has 4 other siblings as well, so if I give her $200, the next 4 will expect the same, 2 are engaged as we speak. DH won't know what I give her, I assume he would notice a grand missing from the bank account, but other than that it is up to me.
    I just am kind of sick by the amount of money they are spending, I know it is none of my business, but part of me figures, if they have this much to blow, do they care, or are they blowing this much to re-coup the expense, KWIM?

    Comment by 2kids2dogs2cats (original poster) at 2:53 PM on Oct. 3, 2013