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This job is about to get really interesting...or very politically incorrect!!!

So, Ive mentioned here before that my dh and I manage a retirement living community of about 85 seniors. All very independent, and cognizant. We have new co managers starting Friday. Ive met them, and they seem wonderful. Perfect for this job, and people that we (dh and I) can really enjoy working with. The "interesting" part is it is a gay couple. Two men. Totally not a problem for us, but this generation of people are know for two things: 1. Not always being very openminded and 2. Having no filter. They say whatever comes into their head. (Not all of them, but a majority). For example, they will frequently say things like "I really love the outfit you are wearing... It's so much better's than yesterday. Yesterday you looked so fat." I just laugh and shrug it off. But I don't know if Im excited for the new managers to start on Friday, or dreading some of the crappy things that people might say.

My question is: Do you think middle age men are going to be aware and prepared for this, and I should be fairly confident they can handle it? Or do you think they need some kind of a heads up that this population of people can really say some untactful remarks?? When I first started working here, they could really hurt my feelings...


Asked by Nimue930 at 10:32 PM on Oct. 9, 2013 in Money & Work

Level 32 (56,725 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • I would think they've herd it all by now, but a heads up that the filter between brain and mouth in this community is broken.

    Even if I'd heard it all before, a simple heads up that it happens is always appreciated.

    Answer by Rosehawk at 11:59 PM on Oct. 9, 2013

  • I understand that you are wanting to "protect" them but it may come off as the wrong way if you try to warn them. They are adults and should be able to handle it.


    Answer by JeremysMom at 10:53 PM on Oct. 9, 2013

  • If their working with the elderly, I'm sure they're already aware how closed minded "some" elderly people can be.
    On the flip side, I know some couples that are elderly, married, but both gay, but back in the day, that's what they did to fit in with families and not be ostracized.
    I'm sure they'll be fine.

    If not, they weren't meant to be in this field.

    Answer by KTElite at 11:21 PM on Oct. 9, 2013

  • They'll be fine. They've probably experienced far worse than you seniors will likely dish out.

    Answer by tessiedawg at 11:30 PM on Oct. 9, 2013

  • Does this "couple" have experience working with elderly?

    I know that in this generation people are more open-minded and tolerant but I also know that it hasn't always been this way. I've never worked with seniors and I know this. Therefore I would assume that if the "couple" have any experience working with seniors that they would be aware and prepared for this. If not, I personally do not think it is your responsibility to give them a heads up. If they can't stand the heat.....I'm sure you can find someone that can.

    Answer by tempsingl3mom at 10:42 PM on Oct. 9, 2013

  • Maybe you could tell the new couple about how some of the seniors complimented your outfit in a backhanded way, by saying it was much better than the one you had on the day before that made you look fat. That could give them a bit of a heads-up without you actually coming out and mentioning their sexual orientation. If they're reasonably discreet about their public affection, many of the older people will probably also rstrain their mouths for the sake of politeness.

    Answer by Ballad at 10:52 PM on Oct. 9, 2013

  • *your

    Answer by tessiedawg at 11:31 PM on Oct. 9, 2013

  • They're gay - I promise you with the way some people are these days, they already know that some people aren't very open-minded. They'll be able to handle it, without a heads up from you. I'd be very surprised if they don't expect at least some of the residents to be narrow minded.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 7:51 AM on Oct. 10, 2013