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What was I supposed to do?

My kindergartner went to school without breakfast this morning. The kind of cereal she wanted was all gone, and she flatly refused to eat anything else, even though she was offered several choices of things she usually likes. It was pure stubbornness on her part, nothing else. I explained to her with no success that lunch was several hours away and that she would be very hungry by then. Finally, I sent her out the door with her dad. Short of forcibly stuffing food in her mouth, it was all I could think of to do.

She hadn't been at school half an hour when I got a call from the health aid over there, who told me that kids showing up without breakfast was a big red flag and something that needed to be addressed. I told her what had happened, and that I had packed an extra snack in my daughter's lunch bag in case it was needed. The health aid seemed to accept the explanation, but none too graciously.

Can I get in trouble for this? I can see why the school wouldn't want parents to send their kids without *offering* them breakfast. But what was I supposed to do? It's not like this is a habitual thing. Will it go on my daughter's permanent school file or anything?


Asked by Ballad at 11:22 AM on Oct. 10, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 45 (193,996 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (21)
  • They can try to make a big deal about it, but you can't force her to eat. You would be in much bigger trouble for trying to force food down her throat than for packing an extra snack because she refused to eat. I would be tempted to throw this back at them and ask them what they suggest I do when my child refuses to eat. What solution do they suggest? Why would they automatically assume that I didn't try to feed my child before sending them to school?

    That would really piss me off. I'm short on patience lately anyway, but this would have me in fits. It almost does already and it's not even my kid.


    Answer by QuinnMae at 11:29 AM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • My kids have gone to school plenty of times without breakfast for that very same reason. As parents we try our best, but like you said, you can't force her to eat. Fortunately, I've never had a school contact me. In elementary school the kids were always able to bring morning snack, so it was never an issue, I guess. I think schools spend way too much time focusing on things like BMI and whether or not a child misses an occasional breakfast. Maybe they should spend that time and energy on actually teaching children the basics of reading, writing, and math.

    Answer by anime_mom619 at 11:34 AM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • so what your daughter went to school and said she didnt get breakfast? Did they ask her why?
    Mine refuses to eat sometimes, its just too dang early and she cant handle it so she gets a glass of milk.

    She clearly understands that no breakfast means possibly hungry later but never have I ahd the school intervene.
    I would not worry about it. I would make sure yoru daugter also knows that if she refuses to eat againa nd you get a call about it then there will be consequences for not telling the whole story.

    Answer by luvmygrandgirl at 11:31 AM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • I doubt anything will come of it, I mean they contacted you and you explained. Not much you can do with a kid who refuses to eat out of being stubborn!

    now, if it happens often? that would be different

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 11:27 AM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • I don't know if they write that kind of thing down in a file. How did they even know she didn't have breakfast? Lots of kids refuse to eat what is offered, I can't imagine that this is so uncommon. I never ate breakfast because I didn't like cereal and that's what was served at our house. Not much my mom could do if I wouldn't eat it.

    I don't think you can be in trouble over this, and I think the school over-reacted.

    Answer by ohwrite at 11:30 AM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • My DD has gone without breakfast before by her choice & I have never received a call about it.

    Answer by 3libras at 11:37 AM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • WTF?! Wow, the school over-reacted big time. That is seriously fucked up in my opinion. So what if she skipped breakfast, it was her choice. They need to back the fuck up.

    Answer by kmath at 12:44 PM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • Maybe they should spend that time and energy on actually teaching children the basics of reading, writing, and math.




    Answer by QuinnMae at 11:37 AM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • That's crazy! My son (now 13) doesn't eat breakfast in the morning and hasn't for a couple years. It makes him ill to eat that early. He may have a glass of milk but that's it. I've never gotten a call from the school!

    Answer by missanc at 1:05 PM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • With all the problems you have with this school, I wonder why you pay for it. This is not normal, for a school to notice a child in passing mention they didn't have breakfast that day, or for them to make such a huge deal about it. Kids at DS's school who get breakfast from school have to eat it in their rooms now. If they're not done before the final bell, or don't have time to eat it, they don't get breakfast - they are allowed to save it for snack.

    Answer by NotPanicking at 2:51 PM on Oct. 10, 2013