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Do you go all out for kid's birthday parties?

I am feeling bad because I did not plan anything big for DD's birthday party. We are just having a few friends over to our house for cake, no big party games, no party favors, ect. I tried that last year, spent days organizing, made a huge cake that was a pain in the ass and took like 4 hours, and only had 1 family that I invited show up. It was a huge effort with a huge disappointment, so this year DH and I both agreed that we would not be renting a place out, we would not be spending days planning a party, and I would not spend an entire morning make a huge extravagant cake. I have a feeling I will be judged by the other mothers for not giving out party favors or planning some over the top activity. However, I saved my sanity. I am making a simple cake that we will decorate with sprinkles and a 3 candle, and they can play with games DD already has.

 
AF4life

Asked by AF4life at 9:36 PM on Oct. 10, 2013 in General Parenting

Level 44 (185,714 Credits)
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Answers (15)
  • im like you, every year i buy all the decorations, get a big beautifully decorated cake, plan a bunch of crap, and nobody shows up.

    so of course, last week when it was my 7 year old's bday party i just made one batch of cupcakes, bought a few snacks for the party and food for the sleepover (she was having some of the party friends sleepover) and that's it. i had just dance 4 on for entertainment and twister out. i did do party favors but those are cheap.

    well wouldn't you know it... i plan for a small turnout, and 13 kids show up. luckily i had just enough cupcakes for everyone & just enough food.

    i just wish people would RSVP and actually stick with whatever they RSVP.
    tnm786

    Answer by tnm786 at 9:39 PM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • We never do/did big parties. My rule was that if gifts were likely to appear (like when I took 8 boys bowling or to a gaming venue), I made 8 goodie bags. Often, I'd write "No Gifts Please" on the invite. Your dd is young enough that I don't think a goodie bag is important. It is just a big ol' playdate at that age. Save the bday crazies for when they are older and understand better.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 10:23 PM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • The biggest mistake that I made was doing big birthday parties from ages 2-6. We spent lots of money to rent a place, cake, food, party favors that were probably never used, etc. For the past two birthdays and this one coming up, we did home birthdays with simple games, a cake, etc. Next year he turns 10 so I may do something big then but I enjoy the home parties so much more.

    JeremysMom

    Answer by JeremysMom at 9:40 PM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • Yeah, at that age a big party is really unnecessary, IMO. I think you are doing the fight thing by keeping it simple!

    kmath

    Answer by kmath at 9:49 PM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • Nope we have family over for cake and ice cream and some times a meal.
    Maybe every 5 or 6 years we would do a bigger party and not at such a young age as 3 years old.
    On those occasions that party was separate from the family celebration and the child was allowed one guest for reach year of their age at the time. Parents and siblings did not stay for these parties. This is many years ago.
    Dardenella

    Answer by Dardenella at 9:56 PM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • I went all out when my daughter turned five last spring, with similar disappointing results. I've wanted to give my daughter awesome birthday parties because my mom didn't do that kind of thing and I always would have liked her to, but I'll probably scale back next time around.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 10:01 PM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • We did small family parties through their 3rd birthday. When they turned 4 we starred doing big parties with friends,favors and fun. They were ready, understood what was happening, and now in their teens they remember it!
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 10:15 PM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • Last year for my sons bday we had just moved to a new town and we hadn't even had a chance to make friends yet, so my son invited his whole class to his party at the park... 2 kids showed up. One of his friends had his sisters too so it wasn't too sad, but there were other kids at the park so we invited them to have cupcakes and gift bags and all these kids we never saw before sang happy birthday to my son.
    So ya after a year like that I am scared to prepare all this stuff for no shows again! but I actually just got a big box of stuff rom oriental Trading Co of dino rings, dino masks, dino tattoos. I know that even if I have a lot of all these treat bags left over the toys wont be wasted, my son and nephew are in love with dinos
    cassie_kellison

    Answer by cassie_kellison at 10:15 PM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • Well I think it REALLY depends on their age. Some ages are mild stones.
    When my son turned 1 , I had nearly 100 family/friends and had an amazing party with LOTS of food and
    great cheers . Other mild stone birthdays : 5 , 10, 15, 18 , 21, ect.

    ~Cyn
    cynzbryte

    Answer by cynzbryte at 11:02 PM on Oct. 10, 2013

  • Nah. I half-ass that shit. Give them some water guns and lock the little bastards outside. Winning.
    BeaverHouse

    Answer by BeaverHouse at 9:01 AM on Oct. 11, 2013

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