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My sister is a year and a half older than me. She's always treated me like she was better than me even today in our 40's. Every time I've asked her a simple question she snaps at me or makes me feel stupid. This past December she trashed me when I was already at my lowest. I was having severe financial problems and decided I only had enough to barely pay for the children's presents for Christmas.(my son and her two kids) I asked if it was ok if we just bought for the 3 of them and no one else. I even said don't buy me anything.
Then she went off on me. She said I was disrespecting my parents because I couldn't afford a $20 gift for each of them even though I knew I'd get something under the tree. I said why don't you respect my wishes to not get me anything and not make me feel worse than I already do. She said my guilt is my own problem. I told her my entire story and she even said she's been there but continued to make me feel horrible. I also told her I was tired of her attitude toward me, her snapping and bitchiness towards me. She said she's never done that and I was making that up because I was scared of my current situation. Granted this attitude and bitchiness has been going on since we were kids. She's very controlling and thinks she's right about everything.
I finally decided this past July, after 8 months of dealing with this, not sleeping, my health was affected etc. that I wasn't going to let her affect me anymore. I said sorry for not being there the last 6 months but you hurt me a lot. She never apologized.
Now she's getting married in California and I'm forced to go. I still can't stand her and don't want anything to do with her. She claims she wants me in her life but she makes no effort. She obviously doesn't care about how she treated me.
I've read to oust toxic people. She is one of these people. How has anyone else handled people like this? She's off living her life and has everything and I'm trying to make changes so the financial issues don't happen again. But I'm stuck having to pay for things going on this trip that I don't want to go on. She bought the tickets before I ever said I was going to go. She just assumed I was going. if I said I can't afford to go, the rest of my family with think I'm acting immature and spiteful. I'm tired of them thinking I have all this money and trips like this is no big deal. Why can't they just get it through their head that I can't do these things right now.
Asked by Anonymous at 8:14 PM on Oct. 12, 2013 in Relationships
Answer by Ballad at 8:32 PM on Oct. 12, 2013
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Answer by PartyGalAnne at 11:40 PM on Oct. 12, 2013