Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

My daughter wants to be friends with liars.

Hi all
I am asking this because I am not sure what to do.
My daughter wants to be friends with these two girls. The problem is that these girls lie non stop. I do not want my daughter to pick their habit. Also these girls run the street all the time.
I just think that they are trouble. I know that the lady across the street will not even allow her daughter to play with them either, 

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:30 PM on Oct. 14, 2013 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (20)
  • You aer the parent. You put your foot down and say 'no'. Don;t do it without explanation though. With out verbally tearing these children down explain to DD that you have certain rules and expectations for her because that is how you have chosen to raise her. you want her to be safe and you want her to be an honest person. Explain that you feel that these are not good friends to choose. She needs friends that will build her up not get her into trouble or tempt her to make choices that go against what she feels is right.

    Are there any local clubs or classes she could get involved in to help her met friends that are better choices for her?
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 5:36 PM on Oct. 14, 2013

  • Not in this case. Is she aware they are liars? Can you prove them to be liars? I mean realty it's one thing to listen to the gossip, but you have to dig to make sure it is TRUE. Then explain why she cannot be friends with these girls.
    2autisticsmom

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 5:36 PM on Oct. 14, 2013

  • Yeah, if you have proof these two lie then explain it to your daughter. If they all go to school together the only thing you can do is keep her from hanging with them after school and explain to her WHY you don't want them around. She will have to make up her own mind about what to do while at school.
    kmath

    Answer by kmath at 5:42 PM on Oct. 14, 2013

  • My daughter told that they lied to me. But she tells me when they leave because she don't want me to tell them to go home. I think that it is sad when you can not trust a children.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:42 PM on Oct. 14, 2013

  • I am a lot like my daughter, I want to see the good in them, But I am just burned out with people lying and taking advantage of people. Also my daughter is a follower, I tell her all the dang time to stop being a follower.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:47 PM on Oct. 14, 2013

  • How old are these kids? If they're fairly young, you can just say no, and explain that you want your daughter to find friends who are safe and who will be positive in her life. But if they're older, sooner or later, you have to give your best advice and let your kiddo learn to tell the tinsel from the real gold on her own. You should still have rules about her letting you know where she wants to go and for how long, and about honesty in your family.
    Ballad

    Answer by Ballad at 5:55 PM on Oct. 14, 2013

  • Ballad
    My daughter is 11 the other children are about 9 and 12
    I know what you mean. I am letting her do more but it is hard knowing that she just follows what they tell her
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 6:00 PM on Oct. 14, 2013

  • Her being 11 my advice would be to sit down and lay out the rules. That she isn't allowed to lie, isn't allowed to go anywhere without telling you and certain places are off limits.

    My son is "friends" with a boy next door, my son is nearly 6 but he knows that if he misbehaves while playing with him he gets punished, if he even just stands by and watches as the other child does something against the rules(instead of walking about and coming back inside(they only play in the courtyard right outside my patio)....he gets punished(not as severly as if he was to do the act though).

    He is responsible for his behavior and will be punished accordingly. "Following" others does not excuse his behavior.
    tntmom1027

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 6:08 PM on Oct. 14, 2013

  • but it is hard knowing that she just follows what they tell her
    Anonymous Comment by Anonymous (original poster) a minute ago

    ^^^^^THAT needs to stop ASAP! Your child needs to stand up & do what's right, not what's popular. She needs to surround herself with like-minded friends who can find ways of having a fun time w/out the need to lie & misbehave. Instill that in her now before the teen years come around.
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 6:09 PM on Oct. 14, 2013

  • Mrsmom110
    Thank you I will be doing that tonight,
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 6:27 PM on Oct. 14, 2013

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.